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3 Bumps

For Grandma's that babysit their Grandchildren!

Maybe This time I will get a better response,I have wrote about this topic a few times only to get reply's saying,"You want money to babysit your own Grandkids?"Its probably women with Moms who r retired and have retirement SS coming in or who do not need the money.I wouldn't ask for it either except this is my case,I have taken care of my GD since born,never ask for anything,plus I do love and enjoy her very much.Now I understand the expression,If I'd known how wonderful it was being a grandparent,I'd.had them first:) anyway I have her 3 to 4 days a wk.8 to 10 hours each day,sometimes all weekend.My dd makes pretty good money and her and bf just got a place together.She works real hard being a Mom and taking care of their place.Sorry My deal here is I need to go back to work myself,My husband hours have been cut way down.When I mention all this to my dd she starts worrying about who's going to care for her dd?she hates the thought of daycare not to mention their prices!Wow I was surprised at how much they charge to.I just would need something a wk to help us out some,of course no where near daycare fees.She said she would rather pay me and that has been awhile back has given me very little and hasn't paid me since knowing our situation.Is this bad to ask for help for caring for your grandchild?when u do so much for your kid?And what if I don't want to be stuck home most the wk.caring for grandkids,I raised 4 and still have one home.How about you Grandma's that take care of Grandkids!What is ur situation?Sorry again soo long just feel quilty I guess for needing some help too!

Answer Question
 
karencrouch

Asked by karencrouch at 4:51 PM on Dec. 12, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 10 (427 Credits)
Answers (31)
  • Grampa (my dad) watches our kids and he's thrilled to do it. Family does that for each other and he loves seeing his grandkids. The idea of compensation for services has never even occurred to him.
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 5:16 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • im not a grandma...but my mom babysits my daughter for me, so i can work. i live in canada, so things are probably different, but, because i am low income i am able to get help from the government for paying for childcare..my mom averages about $250-300month from the gov't..and because shes my mom, she doesnt MAKE me pay her any extra money (im a single mom, so some months its tough,but i do try to give her a couple hundred a month..some months its only 100..but i do what i can afford)..but i also help her out in other ways..cutting her grass, taking her out for breakfast, once in a while..help around the house etc..but with that being said..if your daughter has a good job, and seems to be working lots..she should pay you something..even if its just something like 50/week..
    alexis_06

    Answer by alexis_06 at 5:19 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • It never did to me either b/c Papa and I love being with them very much.but now I need to go to work and wish we didn't need me too.Its just been hard to decide what to do.I don't want to see her go to daycare either but I need to help my DS out too and can't do it staying home,that's why she said she would give me something a wk.for helping her but haven't yet and still in same bind.
    karencrouch

    Comment by karencrouch (original poster) at 5:28 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • My mom kept my daughters without a thought, but my MIL would come up with all kinds of reasons why she could not be bothered with it. I would tell your daughter that you need to go back to work, if it were me and my mom I would offer to pay her to keep the girls before I went to using a daycare.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 6:26 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • You know, if I were asking my MIL to babysit for my children on a regular basis instead of placing them in daycare, I'd be paying her.
    Once in a blue moon, no, I would not offer to pay her.

    Good luck with it.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 8:45 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • Anybody who says that a grandparent should watch their grand kids EVERYDAY for free is either stupid or a spoiled brat. Sure, maybe if I was going out for a day or a dinner date with DH...of course she would watch them for no charge, and they have before. But everyday? That's beyond the call of duty for a grandparent. They have raised their kids and it is MY job to provide for mine, whether than means paying someone while I work or staying home. A grandparent can love and enjoy their grand kids and still want a life of their own, meaning a job or school or friends or what have you. I think your daughter sounds like she's taking advantage of the situation. I would never presume to ask my mom to watch my kids every day without some compensation because that is a full time job. Why should she be tied down with no chance to work, earn money, or do anything because I decided to have kids? I would get firm and say she pays or you...
    ErinHill226

    Answer by ErinHill226 at 11:54 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • have no choice but to get a job because you need the money. You have done more than your fair share in this situation. Those are HER kids and families help each other, yes, but it's not your job to half raise them for free while you struggle financially if she can afford to pay you. Don't let anybody make you feel guilty. Good luck, and I hope your daughter understands. Oh, and I'm not saying to be mean about it. Just say you are filling out applications or something and when she asks why say something like "Well, since you were never able to give me the X amount per week we had talked about, I really need to get a job so make ends meet. I planned on letting you know in time to find alternate child care." That way, she has the option to start paying you. And if you are able to fit some child care around your work schedule later and want to watch them, do it that way. Oh, and I'm not a grandma...
    ErinHill226

    Answer by ErinHill226 at 11:58 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • I am not a grandma yet, working on it, but I would never ask for money unless I was in very much need!
    older

    Answer by older at 8:05 AM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • Thankyou Older!Very well put.That's exactly my situation and what I feel too.Thanks again:)
    karencrouch

    Comment by karencrouch (original poster) at 11:23 AM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • Very well put Erinhill226.Finally someone got what I was saying:)
    karencrouch

    Comment by karencrouch (original poster) at 11:29 AM on Dec. 13, 2010

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