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3 Bumps

Disciple and Christmas

Please moms help me. My oldest son is disrespectful, rude, disobediant, and mean to his younger brother daily. Tell me why I should give him a bunch of Christmas presents when he is in trouble, time out and spanking, and losing privledges everyday. I can't for the life of me figure out why I need to give this child gifts.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:16 PM on Dec. 12, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (12)
  • i myself wonder the same question daily.
    sodapple

    Answer by sodapple at 3:24 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • You shouldn't , have a heart to heart and tell him straight out how you are feeling and if he does not change what the consquences will be. Maybe the best thing would be to shock him with no presents on Christmas Day. I would not return or not buy him present s but I would give him presents as he earns them even if it is after christmas. I do not envy your position. Good Luck and Best Wishes to you and your family.
    mrsljamieson

    Answer by mrsljamieson at 10:24 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • Thats a tough one but I would still give my kids Christmas.
    MommyTanisha

    Answer by MommyTanisha at 10:17 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • I think that there has to be another way to teach him or punish him other than taking his Christmas away. I would not be able to do that. Good luck to you and maybe you should remember how much you love him, that might help!
    Peajewel

    Answer by Peajewel at 1:37 AM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • I don't think Christmas gifts should be used as a form of punishment.
    You did not state how old he is.
    How is he in school??
    Are you consistant in your punishments? Does he know that 100% of the time if he does X , Z will happen??
    You may want to look up 1-2-3 magic. Punishment works best when it is consistant and if you take away something of value to them.
    What you could do if he acts up on Christmas day do not let him play or use his christmas gifts until he straightens out. I am thinking there may be more to this than meets the eye. You may need to take him to a therapist, and get to the root of the matter. I would also voice your concerns to his doctor.
    justgrape723

    Answer by justgrape723 at 9:23 AM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • How old? When my twins were about 7 I was feeling and thinking exactly the same way you are now. They still believed in Santa. I had a friend of mine write a letter from Santa to each of them telling them that he knew and he saw what they had been doing. These letters were on special paper and I placed them on HUGE chunks of coal! Right in front of their bedroom door so it was what they saw first thing Christmas morning. I have never seen two more somber kids! I let them soak in it for quite a while then me as mommy gave them what they had asked for. Now 20 years later they still remember and I still see the somber faces! It was hard for me to do but they sure got it. And I think it kept the magic of Santa alive quite a bit longer for my boys. Good luck to you and I sure hope you have a happy holiday season.
    Noosa

    Answer by Noosa at 10:45 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • it a tough one im gonna bump you
    angelbaby1323

    Answer by angelbaby1323 at 10:22 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • How old is he?
    Arkaidy

    Answer by Arkaidy at 10:37 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • Kids go through all kinds of phases. I took my children to visit shelters and took blankets and food to homeless camps for many years. sometime they need to see how lucky they really are. and its tradition that they do even now that they are older.
    witchypoo1228

    Answer by witchypoo1228 at 10:46 PM on Dec. 12, 2010

  • Christmas is about giving because you love that person. You should never give any kid a ton of gifts. Keeping it simple for all your children is important so they can foster and nurture the true reason for the season. Providing a special gift for your son who is acting out can be very nurturing for him to know how much you care. I think there are so many more issues going on. You should not have to yell, spank, place in time out, and take things away every single day. So this is a huge thing. Write notes to your child. Love notes. Notice how wonderful he is and write about it. Read them to them if he doesn't read. Spend time playing with him - just you and him. See a certified play therapist.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 11:45 AM on Dec. 13, 2010

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