Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Physical contact problems.

My daughter won't hug me, and she hasn't since she was around 6, I thought that she'd grow out of it as she got older, but she won't hug or touch anybody, and shudders if people just brush past her. But other than that she's really sociable and has loads of friends. The only time I've ever seen her hug anyone was when her best friend's relative died and even then she was shuddering. Is this an issue I should be concerned about or should I just learn to deal with it? I've tried everything to encourage her to hug and just generally do physical contact over the years because I think it might be a problem in later life. :S. What do you think? What could have caused it?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:59 PM on Nov. 7, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (6)
  • i think it is something to be worried about, I know this might be hard to hear or ask about but something could have happened to her, some one she was close to might have touched her in a way she was uncomfortable with

    Answer by mommadent at 3:01 PM on Nov. 7, 2008

  • I would def worry about it and talk to her. Something has made her to where she does not like affection!

    Answer by capemomofalyssa at 3:15 PM on Nov. 7, 2008

  • Or that's just how she is. I can't stand it either.

    Answer by AnitaVersion2.0 at 6:31 PM on Nov. 7, 2008

  • do you have a kissy huggy family in general? i ask b/c i grew up in a house where we were always kissing each other goodnight, good morning, good to see you, goody kissy huggy all the time and now i hate to be touched. There was never any inappropriate touching in my home, i just didn't like it. when i turned my head from a kiss, i was made to feel like that was wrong. it was very confusing for me, so now, i never make my kids kiss/hug hello or good bye. my oldest son is very reserved in this way, but my younger son is huggy lovey as you can get! let your daughter decide what she is comfortable with. as long as you don't have a reason to believe that she has been hurt, leave her alone. don't ever make her feel guilty for not being affectionate.

    Answer by bestmommyeber at 1:19 AM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • just talk to her and ask her- it might just be she isnt an affectionate type of person.

    Answer by j-hunt at 5:27 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • Ive never mad my kids hug.I have several children who hug all the time.I have one that hugs but you can tell she really doesnt like to.However these were not sudden changes.She has always been this way.If there is ever a sudden change then be ware of dangers.Open your eyes.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.