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Whatever happened to "do it because I told you to"?

I see alot of questions on here about getting your kids to do this or that,and the ladies tell them to reason with the kid,or bribe them in some way.
if its something they must do for their safety or well being,I say "do it because I said so!"
I see this alot with the cart issue. The kid wants to walk,you want them to ride,they throw a fit,they end up walking.


Asked by butterflyblue19 at 1:55 PM on Dec. 13, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 50 (383,297 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • LOL! I hear ya! I just simply tell mine, "some things are not up for discussion or debate- so end of discussion." If I have explained why I want them to do or not to do something- I dont care to argue about it or justify my reasoning to them. I am the parent, they are the child, period.

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 2:02 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • As for the public tantrums, I have left a cart-full (sorry clerks) & left the store to come home. I will NOT tolerate such behavior. It's much easier to shop alone!

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 2:04 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • I agree!!! A 2 year old doesn't need a reason.

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 2:14 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • There's a world of difference between explaining something that doesn't make sense, and refusing to argue a point with your child. I am the parent, not their friend. I have a reason for anything I tell them to do, and being asked why isn't always necessary. They won't wind up damaged because I told them "I told you to" when I say pick up their toys and they ask why.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 2:22 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • Well...regarding the cart issue, it isn't because i told you so, it's because it's dangerous otherwise.

    I don't see any problem giving a child a reason behind your request.

    I don't just want my child to follow orders, i want him to follow orders that make sense.

    Answer by UpSheRises at 1:58 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • Some things I just tell mine they are going to do and that is it. Others, like why we pick up toys, brush teeth, and take a bath, I don't mind explaining. When we're in a store, when we go to a museum or just some public place, and I'd put my son in a cart or stroller and he would throw a fit, my daughter hasn't done that yet, we would leave the store. I only had to do that a few times before it sunk in that what I said went and going home was a lot worse than riding in the cart.

    Answer by wildflowers25 at 2:12 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • do it becasue I said so is a great saying. I don't use it all the time, but some times it's for the best.

    Answer by paulswife208 at 2:17 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • Growing up I got a lot of, "BECAUSE I'M THE PARENT AND YOU'RE THE CHILD!!!!!" It was demeaning. I would simply ask why they were asking me to do something cause it didn't make sense to me and if I didn't ask, "how high?" when my dad said to jump I got my head bitten off. I have nearly zero relationship with him and it made me feel badly about myself and my relationship with him. I give my son a reason behind the things I ask him to do if he asks why. That doesn't mean it's a compromise or that he's getting out of it, but I have no problem telling him why. If he wanted to walk and I wanted him to sit in the cart I would put him in the cart and he would ask why and I would say, "because it's safer so you're going in the cart. End of story." I'm not a fan of the, "because I said so" or "because you're a child so you listen to me!" You can be firm on an issue while being more respectful of your children imo.

    Answer by Kisses4Henry at 2:10 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • "Because I said so" is a perfectly acceptable explanation in our house. At least in my book. My 10yo would probably argue that with me. She thinks she deserves to know the reasoning behind every little thing I tell her and, frankly, she doesn't. It's none of her business why I decide to do things a certain way and I don't have to spend an hour arguing with her over it. Usually I will give them a short reason as to why there is a rule or chore or whatever but when they keep whining and asking about then I will tell them, "because I said to do it," and that should be the end of it (rarely is with the 10yo because she likes to aggravate me).

    Answer by justanotherjen at 2:31 PM on Dec. 13, 2010

  • I'm with you. My kids and I have a great relationship. However, they DO respect me as their authority, and they know that if they start arguing, things will NOT go in their favor. Sometimes when an explanation is reasonable in order to actually teach them something, that's fine, but when they are talking back because they don't want to do something...mama ain't happy. It doesn't happen often in my house. I see what you're talking about all the time in real life...people begging and wheedling and bribing their children to obey them. WTF?
    My kids are NOT perfect by any means, but they are pretty well behaved and I do attribute that in large part to the consistent discipline, boundaries, and take-no-shit-off-the-munchkins attitude in my house, lol.

    Answer by vicesix at 3:59 PM on Dec. 13, 2010