Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

4 Bumps

Why is it so hard to just be happy for someone (venting sorry)

I just found out that i was pregnant and it was surprise because this wasn't planned but my husband and i are very happy about this. When i told my mother about it she just went on and on about all the negatives. When we told my in laws my FIL started to scold us like we were children and then said "well i guess congratulations" and my MIL wouldn't even talk about it she just changed the subject. it really hurt both myself and my husband. I just don't understand why people can't just be happy. i understand being shocked at first i was to because we using BC but that fails sometimes. I just don't understand why they can't be happy. This is my second pregnancy. With my first we got nothing but negative things said to us. I was 20 at the time. My mother went as far to ask me if i wanted to get an abortion or if i couldn't do then i should consider adoption. But after mys on was born everyone went on and on about how happy they were for him to be here and what a wonderful mother i am. Why can't we just skip all this drama?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:14 AM on Dec. 14, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • I wish it was that way but with both of my pregnancies my MIL tried to talk my husband into convincing me that abortion was the way to go. She even offered to pay for them.
    My parents with my first both my parents were upset because I was only 18 and the only 1 out of 7 siblings with a head on my shoulders. I had my own place a great job, going to school once fall came. I had to drop everything so my husband could continue his dreams and join the military. I did go to school after a while though. With my 2nd pregnancy my parents were happy but like I said my MIL offered to pay for an abortion.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 12:18 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • happyYes my mother always said stuff like don't you remember how you got that way the first time? CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND!!!!

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:23 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • Congratulations Momma to you and your husband. I wish for you a healthy easy pregnacy and a quick birth.

    mistynights234

    Answer by mistynights234 at 12:26 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • Why on earth is everyone so negative about it? You're married. You're an adult. Are you destitute? Homeless? Mooching off people? What reason do they have to NOT be happy for you? That makes no sense. They should be happy for you. What horrible parents.
    FluffyMamaBunny

    Answer by FluffyMamaBunny at 12:26 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • Don't let it get you down. That is the same reaction we got with our second child too! It's your life. Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, no one is going to be happy for us, so we have to be happy for ourselves!


    dancing CONGRATS!

    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 12:27 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • we have our own house that we are renting to own right now my husband has a great job and just be safe he is looking for another job P/T. I'm a stay at home mom but i do make money i watch my friends kids during the day. My husband is in his second year of college. we do have a roommate but that is because she couldn't make it on her own right now so she is staying with us until she gets on her feet. she is my baby sister.

    I don't understand why they can't be happy. we are always helping out my mother. paying so she has heat in her apartment or giving her gas money so she can get to work or buying her food. we are always helping out my in laws. doing them favors giving them gas money. I just wish they would open their eyes and see the mistakes they made last time and not make the same ones this time around.

    And thank you to everyone who has congratulated us.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:32 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • First off: CONGRATS!!! Second - DO NOT allow their negative attitudes to shadow your happiness and joy. If they can't be happy for you - tell them to FUCK off when the baby is born and they come clamoring to see her/him and dote on her/him. Remember: Karma is a BITCH - they'll get theirs....
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 12:53 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • I dont know why people do that. The same thing happened to me with my dad but I was pretty young (18) so I can see why he responded that way.
    thtqrljess07

    Answer by thtqrljess07 at 2:23 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • fingers crossedWhens the party?  Sending out baby pictures and invitations put parents in a good mood.  If they are to busy, hint around in the invites that you take paper or plastic.  LOL  You are right, when it comes time for that bundle of joy, most parents trip over themselves to get the first glance.  Ha!Ha!

    sexyfancyface

    Answer by sexyfancyface at 2:25 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • Im sorry to hear that your family is like that. But congrats hun :)
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 12:44 PM on Dec. 14, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN