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Separation Anxiety

My son does not have separation anxiety yet, but soon he might. My question is how do people handle it? I heard that you should almost (but not quite) cater to it. Let the child be clingy all he wants that way when he is ready to venture out again, he knows that if he ever gets scared then he can come right back. He will have more confidence in himself because he knows that if he ever need anything he can do it. Personally I agree. If I knew without a doubt that I could 100% come back to somebody and find comfort whenever I needed it then I would be more likely to venture further and feel safer. If I didn't know what would happen when I got uncomfortable then I wouldn't want to venture far and become independent. What would happen if I really needed someone and no one was there?


Asked by CalebsMommy0220 at 1:21 AM on Dec. 14, 2010 in General Parenting

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Answers (6)
  • i would hug my child say i love you ill be home soon adn leave no sticking around letting them cry no letting them hang on you...... its hard and you might break down and cry but do it after you have said i love and good by ONLY ONE TIME.

    Answer by lacyjay1987 at 11:35 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • What separation are you talking about? First time at day care? As a early ed teacher it bothers me when parents stick around and act just as clingy as the child. I feel it tells the child that there is something to be afraid of if mom is acting weird about leaving. As a mom it was harder for me to leave my daughter than for her to say PEACE OUT when she first started day care...but I know it's best to just drop off, make sure they are comfortable, and then leave. If the provider is good at what they do then they will have an easy time getting your child interested in something else before they have a melt down, or to get them to stop crying and into some type of play. It's normal for your child to have some type of anxiety but I wouldn't worry until you are dealing with it.

    Answer by dbodani at 1:26 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • No I am talking about just general separation anxiety that happens around age 1 or so. Meaning just being in another room from the mom. I agree with what you said, I am just talking about around the home stuff and everyday things.

    Comment by CalebsMommy0220 (original poster) at 1:29 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • My daughter didn't have that, and still doesn't. She will become extra naughty when I am checking my email or on the phone because I am not giving her attention but she was never scared of being not next to mom. You do what feels right. But I am the type of person who doesn't come running when anyone cries. It shows that you are concerned too. If your son was crying in his room while you were making lunch because he realized mom wasn't next to him and you came running I feel like that might make him more scared to be alone. But I am a big believer in (most) moms know what is best for their children. You'll do what feels right and that will be the best thing for him.

    Answer by dbodani at 1:35 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • I do not come running either because my son self soothes very well. He does not have separation anxiety right now and I do not know for sure if he will, but I was just wondering. Thanks for the insight!

    Comment by CalebsMommy0220 (original poster) at 1:38 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • Yeah.

    Comment by CalebsMommy0220 (original poster) at 9:21 PM on Dec. 14, 2010