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7 Bumps

18 year old daughter who has zero respect, now tells me that she is an adult and does not have to listen

quit her job because she did not like it
refuses to get another job cuz she doesn't want to work with food
attracked to freshman versus her own age, more freinds in that age group

Answer Question
 
joamom92

Asked by joamom92 at 9:54 AM on Dec. 14, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 3 (14 Credits)
Answers (32)
  • freshman-college?
    freshman-highschool?
    Does she live in your house?
    is she on drugs?
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:56 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • sounds like a normal teenager/young adult. if she's living under your roof and treating you like crap, start charging her for rent and other necessities, or she can find a place of her own.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:58 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • She is an adult (in age, at least) and she doesn't have to listen but you don't have to let her live with you either.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:59 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • Well, if she is 18 and knows it all, let her take care of herself. No more roof over her head, no more food on demand. She might develop a love of working with food when she has to have money to pay the rent or put food in her belly. For a big dose of real life, give her an eviction notice - she has 30 days to move or her stuff will be removed from your residence (I would put it in storage, not throw it out) or she can start paying rent. Good luck!

    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 9:59 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • OK number one if some one was living under my roof weather they are 1-80 they will respect me and live by MY rules or they will be out in a heart beat! you can bet on that!... TOUGH LOVE MOM USE IT.. its hard...but a child needs there mother shell come back around.. give her a dead line if you dont have a job in the next 6 months your out. Tell her is she is 18 and an adult then she needs to go get a job go buy a car go get an apt and go buy her own grocries, get her own money pay her own cell bill TOUGH LOVE!!!!!!
    lacyjay1987

    Answer by lacyjay1987 at 9:59 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • well first i know this may be a hard situation to put your self in. but she is the legal age to live on her own.. kick her out! or if you don't want to go that far. if she has a phone take away till she pays the bill. think of the things that she has that you help her with . that is now her job to be responsible for. All she can do is say i can leave if you won't let me .. then say BYE! you want to act this way you. you say your the adult then there is the door!
    Mrs.Ro

    Answer by Mrs.Ro at 10:00 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • If she cant follow your rules treat her like a tenant, if shes late on rent evict her, etc. Good luck sounds like normal teenage behavior to me.
    bellsandheels

    Answer by bellsandheels at 10:01 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • If she wants to be an adult, she needs to grow up and act like one. Your house, your rules. Set her down, tell her she must have a job, she will respect you in your home or she can find another place to live. Yes, it's hard - she's your daughter and you love her. But, she is making her own choice (getting kicked out) by not following the rules.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 10:01 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • I'm sorry but that IS NOT normal 18 y.o. behavior. I would have never behaved like that toward my Mother and my now 23 y.o. didn't behave like that to me. I would not tolerate it at all !!  If she is living under your roof.....she HAS to follow YOUR RULES. If she does not like it she can move out!!


     I would start her out at 50.00 a week for rent. Have her sign a contract with the dollar amount and the house rules. If she doesn't sign it she has 1 mouth to move out


    Sounds like it is time for tough love

    justgrape723

    Answer by justgrape723 at 10:04 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

  • lacyjay1987 - agreed!!! If you continue to emable her she will continue to take advantage of you and only will get worse. Serve her with a 30 day pay or quit notice... let her know she needs to pitch in for food or she doesn't eat, let her know that she also has to help around the house.. no more free rides.. if you don't cut the cord now you will regret it in the near future, it's time for her to act her age and start learning how to live on her own. You as a parent are obgliated to show her the road ;) or she will end up struggling big time in life. "The sooner the better" off she will be.
    BobbieJo286

    Answer by BobbieJo286 at 10:07 AM on Dec. 14, 2010

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