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How do you get out of visiting your in laws?

My husband wants to go visit and stay with his family who live an hour in a half away. I can't stand them, and also don't feel like packing ALL of the kids things to spend every other weekend with them. Any excuses I can use to get out of this?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:20 AM on Dec. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Honestly, you married into his family. His family is going to want to see their son's family and spend time with the grandkids. Unless you have reasons other than your dislike for them, you may as well make nice. Maybe not every other weekend. But, maybe once a month. Suggest that they come your way once in a while too, letting them know that it would be nice not to have to pack up the kids every time they want to see them. Marriage is full of give and take. Not only with your DH but also with his family and yours.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:41 AM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • better get used to this otherwise a lot of silly childish fights are going to happen. As the kids get older the in-laws will back off. Trust me, been there and so know what you are feeling and going through. It is a passage in your marriage that you will go through. GL. I wished I had Cafe mom when I was going through this, because you feel like your privacy is invaded and that your hubby is just a momma's family boy but it just part of the process. Just grin and bear it. Ten years from now you will be like I used to complain about that? Don't sweat the small stuff and always take the the high road.
    mamacita69930

    Answer by mamacita69930 at 11:47 AM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • They live 90 minutes away so why not just come back home after the visit? Why stay the night? Tell hubby that you have no problem visiting, but you'd like to come home afterwards.
    SpiritedWitch

    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 11:49 AM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • Thanks Guys. These are all the right answers to my question :) Glad I have CafeMom.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:56 AM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • HAHA well unlike everyone else i understand how you feel. in my situation i have tried everything to get along with them, but they have a problem with their mexican son dating a white woman. So I just tell my man that i dont want to go, we dont get along and i would just regret going in the first place, but i also tell him him and my dd are more then welcome to go and i will see them when they get back
    xxSummaxx13

    Answer by xxSummaxx13 at 1:08 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • @xxSummaxx13 - I most CERTAINLY understand how she feels. Just because one choses to make nice and "get along" with the in-laws, doesn't mean they don't understand. Been there done that. Life is just too short to play the Hatfields & McCoys game.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 1:41 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • I completely agree with xxSummaxx13. If you really dont want to go, YOU shouldnt go. Your DH and LOs dont have a problem, you do. Let them go without you, and have some fun, while you are home and baby free! Have a spa day, invite your girls over for a movie night, just take a day to relax. And if you dont want to be there, believe me, everyone knows it already, but everyone is just playing nice. No one is happy. Why ruin EVERYONE's day, just because you NEED to go with them? Unless you dont trust your SO, or in-laws, with your kids, without you, why do you have to go too?
    Mme.Langley

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 1:48 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • My husband is free to go visit his mom anytime without me. Sorry, but I don't like her at all (and yes, I have plenty of reasons). I have no desire to to have a sleepover at her house. I would let hubby know that going to visit is fine, but you want to be in your own bed at night.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 2:11 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • I love my in-laws...it is my parents I would prefer to never see. :) YOu married into the family. Maybe compromise and see them once/month.
    Mom2Just1

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 2:46 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

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