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2 Bumps

DD (preschooler) has everyone in the house upset at her. She keeps doing things to frustrate them on purpose. Cont.

What can I do to encourage her to treat the kids properly so they will want to be around her. An example of behavior is the one day she was sitting eating and shouting in my youngest DD's face. My DD asked her to stop multiple times but instead she kept screaming. My youngest DD got up and moved away. She tried to follow her and still screaming but I sent her back to the table to eat. Her outbursts at dinner make sitting as a family rough because all the others want to leave the table due to her behavior. No one wants to play with her because she won't share even though she is old enough. If the other kids have something she excepts them to share. She also hits/bites and when they do defend themselves she cries. She also has lied to me about not hitting first even though I seen her. I have tried talking, time outs, losing privileges but nothing works. I worry as she gets older she will hit the wrong person when I am not around and they will hurt her. She can dish it out but bawls even with a slight push.

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Asked by Anonymous at 12:05 PM on Dec. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (2)
  • I wonder if there's more going on with her. Is she getting enough positive attention? I may be way out of line b/c I only have a son right now who is almost 3 & one on the way, so I haven't dealt with preschoolers yet, but as far as punishment, I've always heard (& practiced) consistency. You have to pic a punishment & stick with it. If you've tried everything, then nothing's consistent, you know? Or maybe she's upset about something & acting out? Have you considered any sort of counseling for her? Maybe that would help.
    I think you're right that if left the way it is now, she will get worse & she will eventually hit the wrong person...but that would be nature's consequence. She'd be learning the hard way. Hopefully you can get this straightened out before things get worse. I'm so sorry you have to deal with it & I wish you all the patience in the world!!!

    Answer by MamaBloom777 at 1:43 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • With the little information I have it sounds like she has learned she can get her way by behaving this way. I could be totally wrong. I think if she is yelling at your younger child I would send her to her room not back to the table to eat. I think if she takes toys from the other kids I would either put her in a time out or something else. For my kids we had colored marbles and jars. You could have one for each child. When they do something good they get a marble, when they are bad a marble gets taken away. If everyone does this then she will see what happens when you are good. After "X" amount of marbles they get a special treat either ice cream or their favorite dinner.

    Good Luck!

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 2:01 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

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