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Do you think its okay or not okay to make new same sex friends and text/talk to them when youre married?

And when I say friends, I mean strictly friends.

I always go back and forth.. i feel like people should have friends i mean why not? but sometimes i feel like some people are just too friendly.. its hard to draw the line!

Where is the line in your marriage when it comes to talking to those of the opposite sex...& not lifelong friends.. im talking like.. new coworkers, new people you meet in college, or wherever you go!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:28 PM on Dec. 15, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • As long as my husband wouldn't be uncomfortable in any conversation I had and I wouldn't feel any tension when the two met, then I see nothing wrong with it.
    MomIWant

    Answer by MomIWant at 7:32 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • As long as I'm not hiding anything from my husband or doing anything that would cause me disturbance if he did it with someone else, then it's OK.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 7:44 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • I don't see why who you do or don't make friends with or how would change simply because you aren't single. My DH can make friends with, chat with, call, text, email and go out with who ever he wants to - same or opposite sex. And I'm the same way. There is no "line" because we are both adults here and we don't see a need to control each others lives.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 7:33 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • Ok so I just got out of a bad situation. I started talking to this guy that went to my high school. And at first it was a good friendship. I even got him to propose to his girlfriend. We talked about sports and relationships. But then he hit me with ur all I think of.He was like even when he with his girl. He said he has feelings for me and he wanted to know if anything could ever happen. I told him there's no chance because I'm happily married. But long story short I had to end the friendship. It can be ok but only if no one crosses the line. He did and I had to end the friendship. There's just a very thin line that requires open communication between spouses. Good thing I told my husband everything that was going on.
    True_Gator_77

    Answer by True_Gator_77 at 9:39 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • No line whatsoever on making friends. Sometimes our friends are all we can lean on! Especially when family is far away.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 9:43 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • As long as you are open with your hubby about your relationship and talk to him about limits. Would you want him to share pics with a gal you didn't know? Would you want him to go out to eat with a gal you didn't know? Then he probably wouldn't want you to either. Include your husband in the friendship. Have the guy over sometime or go out as a group somewhere so that your hubby can build a friendship with him too and so that he can see that you and DH are madly in love. That will help to quell any thoughts this guy might have of crossing lines. Be willing to listen to your hubby's concerns. If you are all together and he makes a comment that rubs hubby the wrong way, listen to his concerns. Your marriage is more important than a new friendship with some guy.
    LadyKatya

    Answer by LadyKatya at 7:02 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • i draw the line at showing pics of myself (bc that can turn into other pics later on), texting too much, and especially no "dinners" just the two of you. i wouldn't make comments about his body or things like that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:30 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • It all depends on what you and your SO find appropriate. What works for my marriage may not work for yours. For us we have some opposite sex freinds, but it is more that WE are friends with the COUPLE. We don't hang out with friends of the opposite sex alone, nor do we chat or text with them. Just not something we have any desire to do.
    Now SAME SEX friends? Yeah, we both have them. No big deal.
    RheaF

    Answer by RheaF at 9:23 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • yep.. one of my best friends is a male..it is great.. when we are pissed at our spouses we go to each other and complain first and then get calmed down before going to our spouse.. it works great because we are both wonderful at putting things in perspective and have avoided major battles this way...

    so my question to put out in response to yours is, is a bi person not allowed to have any friends if they are in a relationship?
    MamaJasmine

    Answer by MamaJasmine at 9:45 PM on Dec. 15, 2010

  • at your question, im not speaking from experience so much lol.. just wondering where people draw their lines, i know a good friend of mine is having trouble in this area and shes been calling me a lot telling me about it.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:00 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

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