Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

5 Bumps

how concerned should I be?

This may seem like a stupid question but I think I'm in shock so please be gentle with me ladies...

I'm a single mom, it's just me and my 16 year old daughter.

Recently I've noticed that she has been going straight to the bathroom after we eat our favorite meals (spaghetti, pizza, chipotle)...I didn't think much of it at first but then I realized it was a constant thing that was occurring after said meals and so last night I followed her and pressed my ear against the door and heard her throwing up.

I raced back to the dining room and waited for her to come out and I asked her point blank, was there a reason she'd been throwing up so much.

She got quiet and said "I wasn't throwing up"

I said, "honey, I heard you"

and she said that it'd only been that time and that she'd eaten too fast. And I told her I knew it wasn't the first time and she broke down into tears and told me...

"I only make myself throw up when I eat something really high in fat or carbs...I've been gaining weight and I'm trying to control it. I love eating those things but I just can't afford to gain the weight"

We talked for a long time about how that's not healthy and how there are other ways to control her weight gain in a healthy way and that I'd start cooking more healthy things for dinner and we'd stop getting take out so much. She agreed to do things the healthy way from now on but I'm worried this may be a pre cursor to the future...or what if there's more to it than I know?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:08 AM on Dec. 16, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (16)
  • Yes you should be concerned. Bulimia and Anoriexia are diseases and should be nipped in the bud ASAP. Get her into counseling now. People die from that! Have her watch some shows on it! It's serious. Don't take this lightly.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:10 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • Try counceling, ive had that problem for about 8-9 years, it started when i was 19& now that im 27 it has gotten worse.its hard for me to stop,i think the same way your daughter does, i love food but everytime i eat i only think about the calories that im consuming, my df tries to help, just this past week we started eating healthy, we bought lots of fruits& veggies, for dinner we made chicken soup w/out the noodles, idk maybe its not the best advice but this is comming from someone who is battling bullemia.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:13 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • See, it starts out as "just trying it" or " I only do it every now and then" and other reationalizations, and the next thing you know, bam! You are dealing with a full blown eating disorder.
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:14 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • That's not a precursor, that's bulimia. I'd get into counseling now, just as Musicmom said. These things can spiral out of control and only get harder to handle the longer they're going on. Best of luck to you both!
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 12:14 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • My hang up is that she is a perfectly healthy weight...and she does seem to only do it when it's something really fattening...like she can eat a huge plate of healthy food and she stays with me long after and watches tv and stuff but when it's something like pizza she does it. It's never healthy to vomit after eating on purpose but I don't want to make a huge deal out of it if she's going to seriously stop once I start feeding her healthier things for dinner.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:16 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • I guess I just don't want to believe she's going through this...
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:16 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • I would definitely be concerned. Maybe take her to her doctor and have her monitored. I know an older lady with bulimia and she is now having serious issues because of it. She is a little over 5 feet tall and she barely weighs 90 pounds. He skin hangs on her. Get her help before it gets out of control. If you have to, take the door off of the bathroom. Granted it won't help when she's not home, but you can always put a shorter leash on her and make her stay home more, if necessary.
    Keilman1

    Answer by Keilman1 at 12:19 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • No matter what you feed her, the complex is there hun! It's not about what she's eating. For someone to do that, there is something going on. Please don't ignore it!
    Musicmom80

    Answer by Musicmom80 at 12:27 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • I knew someone in high school who was hospitalized multiple times for this and it was really life or death. She is still way, way, way underweight 20 years later, I believe still plagued by thinking she is fat.

    Yes, your daughter js not there yet, but she is on the road. She needs to see a professional so you can help her come up with a successful strategy that she can live with...operative word is live.
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 12:42 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • My hang up is that she is a perfectly healthy weight.."

    The thing with bulimia is, for a while they are at healthy weights and appear to be fine, but damage is being done on the inside to the esophagus and just about every other organ.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 12:45 AM on Dec. 16, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN