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anyone have children, and date or marry someone who already has children/?

did they get along right away? how do u earn step children's respect?

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tsmitty221

Asked by tsmitty221 at 2:29 PM on Dec. 16, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I will say this a very trying process. blended family are so hard to deal with.
    14donnamiller

    Answer by 14donnamiller at 2:33 PM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • My Step son is 11 and my daughter is 3. We didn't introduce the kids to our mate until we were sure that it would work out. Then we introduced the kids at lunch.
    We never forced them on each other but let them get used to each other. We also show a united front on the rules and discipline. No child is more favored than the other.
    as for respect, I just treat him like I treat my daughter. She is shown no more favoritism than he is. They are equal. also, it helps that I don't try to act like his mom. I am not his friend but a peer and his dad has made it clear that I have just as much say as his dad does and should be listened to. It's the same way with my daughter.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 2:40 PM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • I agree with 14donnamiller. Blended families are a very trying process. First thing is you and your spouse HAVE to be on the same page with parenting, discipline, rules, chores etc. and if there are ex's involved you and your dh have to be on the same page as to how to deal with them. Most of the time the problems of blending the family are coming from the ex's so if they are not happy about you and dh then it will probably show through with the childs attitude. One of the biggest problems is someone telling you what you should be doing or what rules you should have or not have. If you have an ex (you or your dh) that will interfer on a regular basis it will be difficult.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:46 PM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • Don't actually win the kids over. They either like you or dont. Just be yourself and see what happens. Good luck !
    megamamaw

    Answer by megamamaw at 3:10 PM on Dec. 16, 2010

  • My S/O had 5 kids when we meet (he is 33 Im 27) and his kids liked me from after meeting me a few times and I guess thats because they were still kind of young and I took the time to interact with each one of them.. We then had our son in 07 and everyone gets along just fine.
    Tesha_Ann

    Answer by Tesha_Ann at 6:50 PM on Dec. 16, 2010

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