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2 Bumps

Should I be excited?

The father of my baby and I was talking. (I been asking questions on here about the situation before) We werent even talking about the pregnancy or baby. Cause I know he has a habit of shutting down. He didnt want this but saids he is getting over it and will deal with it. He said that about a month ago. But still acts like an ass when I get emotional. Anyway right out of the blue he types these names down. I ask what they are for and he said those are the names I want the baby to have. I was completely shocked. I dont know if I should be getting excited that he is starting to think of nany names or not?
ETA- At first he just wanted to give me CS and have nothign to do wihtt he baby, but told me earlier this month that if I want the baby can spend the summer with him.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:42 AM on Dec. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Don't get your hopes up. My youngest daughter's father and I talked about names, and I named her one of the names he liked. When I was in labor he wouldn't answer his phone. He wouldn't come to the hospital because he was too busy getting drunk and high with his friends. He came to see her when she was 5 or 6 days old and wanted to hold her almost the entire weekend. He took off when she was about 3 weeks old, and now I haven't heard from him in almost 2 years. Hate to say it, but been there, done that. It sounds to me like he's just trying to control you and doesn't actually want to be around. I could be wrong, but I don't think I am.
    badgirl44654

    Answer by badgirl44654 at 6:20 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • He's showing that he's trying. It takes some men a while to come around and settle in to being a dad.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:34 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • Although he might be totally there yet it seems like he's starting to wrap his head around the fact that he's going to be a father. Good luck to the both of you and don't get your hopes up. Not trying to be a jerk I swear. :)
    marine_wife0520

    Answer by marine_wife0520 at 7:13 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • He's trying and that's a really positive sign. But take it slow, don't apply pressure or read too much into things. It can take men a while to warm to the idea of a baby, even if it is a planned and wanted baby. My youngest daughter (now 3) was very much a wanted baby and we were engaged at the time....yet as it got nearer her due date he began to get restless and frightened. We hit a really hard time, and then things didn't improve much when Sofia was born, but gradually he became more active and more interested. its just scary for them as they may not understand compleltey what is going on and what will happen...sometimes they can't bond with the baby much whilst its in utero, so it may take them a little longer. Don't get your hopes up, but let him mature and grow up on his own (which he will eventaully!)

    Im married to mine now and we have another baby due in 7 wks :)
    little.knickers

    Answer by little.knickers at 7:26 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • I wouldn't get too excited yet, wait until the baby comes and see how he deals with things then. His initial response may have just been panic, but you're not going to know until there is a baby to take care of. I hope things work out for you!
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 7:54 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • What is wrong with men?
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 9:44 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • I wouldn't get too overly excited, just so that you don't get let down. But hopefully he really is coming around. Don't rely on it yet though, because he did tell you how he feels and it wasn;t positive.
    bellsandheels

    Answer by bellsandheels at 12:38 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

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