Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

5 Bumps

I have a huge problem... no-one believe's in me :(

I have goals. I want so badly to meet those goals. But I have no positive motivators or feedback for anything good I do to get closer to those goals.

No-one believe's in me.... not even me anymore.

I do not take well to negative motivators. When someone says, "You can't do it" I don't think, "Oh yes I can! And I'll SHOW you!" I think, "Yeah, they're right... I can't."

Due to this lack of motivation on my part I have only increased the lack of support by showing everyone around me that I really CAN'T commit to my goals or myself or them. Which only makes my problem worse.

My biggest health goal right now is to lose weight. I need to lose about 70ish pounds to get to a healthy weight.

My mom was always supportive of my intelligence, but never supported my physical feats when I would try so hard to lose weight. My boyfriend has told me multiple times (but I don't think he truly means it as harsh as I take it... he is just a blunt person) that he wants to support me and encourage me but he has seen me quit so many times it's hard to.... and I understand how that goes honestly and where he is coming from.

I don't have friends I can work out with (I actually don't have many friends at all), I have a lot on my "plate" right now (obviously much of that plate is full of food as well or else I wouldn't be in this predicament would I?), I have issues with depression and anxiety, I have asthma but no money to see a specialist doctor to get a prescription for an inhaler and my regular doctor won't give me one without seeing the specialist I can't afford, I don't have enough money to join a gym and as you can see I am full of excuses.

Help?! PLEASE?!

How do I find ways to become motivated and to actually commit to myself?

 
Memigen

Asked by Memigen at 11:55 AM on Dec. 17, 2010 in Health

Level 27 (30,799 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Hun, you got choices, use them, why choose one that will bring you down? It would be nice to have support, but if it is not there, you can still do and be whatever you want, you just got to want it bad enough.
    older

    Answer by older at 12:06 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • (((HUGS))) You must believe it yourself or you will not believe us all support starts in your own mind and begins with what you tell yourself
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:01 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • You don't need to join a gym to workout. You can walk. I know our city has a thing you can sign up for for free that encourages you to walk a certain number of miles or something during the season along with other people who have signed up. Check your recreation dept with your city if you have one.

    f you are spending the money for Netflix (don't know if you have $ for that or not) they have workout things on instant on there, or maybe you could shell out $15 to get a DVD you could constantly reuse from Amazon or Walmart or something. Dance while cleaning, whatever.

    As for the food thing, I've never had that issue, but I think I've read that if you drink a glass of water before dinner you won't eat as much. You could try that....Try to eat healthier stuff and maybe slowly reduce the amount of food on your plate till it's an acceptable amount to keep you going yet help you lose weight.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:02 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • First and foremost, you got to love yourself, this is what you are not doing. Erase the can't from your vocabulary, replace it with I can, give yourself credit for what you are capable of, you will be surprised what you can achieve, if you use optimism instead of pessimism.

    older

    Answer by older at 11:58 AM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • walk. alot. cut back on food by about half.when you husband asks tell him " i am on a diet and it would be really nice to have your support on this" if you eat a salad do not use ranch or other dressings.lemon juice is the best. but if you have to use a dressing. then put it in a seperate bowl. dip your fork in it b4 you take a bite of salad. dont stop eating but limit your self. say you usually eat 4000 calories a day. on eat 2000. and drink lots of water. and cut out all sodas.
    2010mommy0914

    Answer by 2010mommy0914 at 12:02 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • Don't know what to tell you about the specialist......Can they do a payment plan kind of thing? I've also heard sometimes they get out free samples so once you get in you may not have to pay for an inhaler right away.

    And yes - it's going to be HARD to change you lifestyle. BUT You CAN do it!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • and i belive you can. i didnt think i could do it either. but i used this diet and its very effective. i lost 11 puonds in 1 month. but you have to belive you can do and keep motivated. and if you drink coffee in the morning. drink it black. 1 cup of black coffee is only 2 calories.
    2010mommy0914

    Answer by 2010mommy0914 at 12:08 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • You have to want to change, and where there is a will, there is a way. All you have to do is find it, and knock every obsicle down until you make it. You dont need friends, you dont need family, all you need is confidence that you CAN succeed. We can do nothing if we dont first think it. So think positive, speak positive affirmations, and know who you are (or at least who you want to be).


    Book suggestion: Sacred Woman


    sugahmamma

    Answer by sugahmamma at 12:09 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • i even had a note book. i called it my fat journal. i wrote down everything i ate or drink and how many calories it was. then i would right down what excercises i did to. it made me feel good about myself to be taking control.
    2010mommy0914

    Answer by 2010mommy0914 at 12:11 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • Sounds like you may need some counseling but probably cannot afford it. So you could look into government programs or your church if you have one. They may be able to help with not only asthma medication but also meds. for your depression and anxiety.

    Also stop talking so negatively to yourself. Put up some affirmative quotes where you will see them around the house--on the refrigerator, inside the cupboard doors, on the bathroom mirror, in your purse, etc. Take your Walkman or IPod with some energetic tunes and force yourself to go for walks. Find an indoor mall and just walk around that if the weather is bad. Think of others and how you can help them to get your mind off of yourself and your problems. I find if I start ACTING like I am happy, energized and positive, the feelings often follow. ((HUGS))
    ChezBelle

    Answer by ChezBelle at 12:12 PM on Dec. 17, 2010