Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

ugh mommy troubles

ok so im 9 weeks pregnant and i know that stressing is really bad right now...but right now me and my mother are in a really big fight and the thing is i havent even told her i was pregnant yet. She hasnt met my boyfriend of almost 1 year and a half and she doesnt want to meet him till next thanksgiving!! thats almost 2 years!! i asked her if he could come over from christmas cause he really wants to meet my family (he is a big family guy) but she wont hear it. she keeps saying im selfish and that im not thinking about my family. I dont understand how i am being selfish if all i want is for the two most important things in my life to meet and get along especially with the baby coming along. its upsetting and she said if im going to keep being selfish she doesnt want to talk to me anymore. so i guess my question is should i just leave her alone or try to talk to her again?

Answer Question

Asked by newmom07142011 at 1:55 PM on Dec. 17, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 7 (177 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I would personally leave her alone, but it's your decision. Why haven't you told her you're pregnant? I think she is being incredibly selfish for not considering your feelings. what is the big deal of you wanting you bf over for xmas. if it was me i would go to my bf family or just the two instead.

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 2:02 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • well i wanted to wait until after the first trimester to tell her... i told my father that i wasnt going over for christmas now ill just stick to my boyfriends family who accepts me and wants me there...thanks :)

    Comment by newmom07142011 (original poster) at 2:03 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • I would just keep your distance from her for awhile. All that matters right now is that you stay calm for your baby. Sounds like your boyfriend is a really great guy, maybe you would have a better time with his family at christmas. Once the baby comes the most important thing is that you, him and the baby start your own family. If your mom doesnt want to have anything to do with your boyfriend then she shouldnt have anything to do with his baby either. Unless he is a real jerk or a felon, she needs to get over it. I would tell her about the baby after christmas and see what happens.

    Answer by wood1980 at 2:07 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • I know how you feel, I didnt tell my family until i was 13 weeks.

    Answer by wood1980 at 2:08 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • @wood1980 he really is a great guy, one of those one of a kind finds... i guess i just wish my mother would just give hima chance.... thanks for the advice :)

    Comment by newmom07142011 (original poster) at 2:12 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • I'm MARRIED and my mom was the same way to my husband and we have been together for 5 years ...with a son and another on the way ..she didn't meet him until our wedding but since i am so close to my mom i figure she just didn't want to acknowledge me growing up. As a mom now i have no hard feelings towards her and i have a better understanding of things that she has done that at one time really upset me, you should have a talk with your mom and let her know that you are pregnant and how much you care about him

    Once i did this with my mom she understood that she needed to go along with things or risk missing out on a huge part of my life she loves our son and respects my husband and our marriage are her child remember that is not easy to watch your children grow up hope all works out

    mom are precious in our lives no matter how old we are :)

    Answer by Roxeybunnie at 2:32 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • @roxeybunnie - i know your right, i love my mom to death and i have explained to her about how i felt about my bf but she is stuck on thinking we wont last :( i hope everything works out

    Comment by newmom07142011 (original poster) at 3:01 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • leave her be, she will eventually come around! And if she doesnt you still have your own family to be around, and your soon to be inlaws

    Answer by courtneycra at 3:19 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • The only one that had good avice was Roxey ^_^ what a beautiful comment i agree 100% need to talk with her if you leave her alone you will regret it later it will just be a lot of regret she will not be around forever you dont know what tomarroow brings and your soon to be inlaws cant replace your mother

    Answer by mixedmommysrule at 3:25 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.