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2 Bumps

first big fight what to do?

so we had our first big fight about him taking me for granted.. we are in counseling and he was supposed to read this chapter in a book and he didnt, two weeks went by and still did not. other things happened two like not responding to my text and things.. anyways so i was asking him to read the chapter and he was telling me he did want to because i was telling him too. so i was like fine you dont want to read it and i tore it out of the book. anyways it escalated and we ended up not talking and he slept on the couch... arrh.. so question is what am i to do.. i texed and said sorry it escalated,, and he said he is almost over the fight,, no sorry or anything... but its gonna be weird when he gets home.. any suggestions


Asked by NaiveDream at 2:41 PM on Dec. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,403 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • You need to decide what it's going to take from him for you to put this behind him. Then you need to spell it out for him. At the same time, you must be willing to allow him to do the exact same thing. You may have to put the words into his mouth, only to get to hear them from him, but that's what it takes. Otherwise, you will not be satisfied with how he handles this. But you must be willing to let him do the same thing--let him tell you what he needs from you for it to be fixed. Then you can both move on.

    Answer by NannyB. at 2:44 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • If you are in counseling you need to ask your counselor .... there is too little from this post for us to determine.

    IF I was to go ONLY on this post I would say you are a bit of a pita and he is tired of it.  Women who whine "Im not appreciated" need to look at them selves and honestly ask... are you appreciating him too?  Do you say it to him?  Do you show it to him?  Or are you tired and whiny?  You hounded him like his mother... men want a WIFE not a mother.  Im sure if you had a sweeter approch he would have done it.  Remember the saying you get more bees with honey.

    Again... your councelor would know better... but this is what I got from what you posted.


    Answer by Anonymous at 2:50 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • Wipe the slate clean and start over fresh when he walks in the door. Don't expect him to say the same things you do after a fight bc he's a guy. They think differently than we do. Sometimes they can't verbally communicate well and try non-verbal things. Just listen. You will hear the I'm sorry if you look hard enough. Pick your battles from now on.

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:59 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • just let it go. is it important enough to jeopardize the relationship? do you think sticking to your guns on this would jeopardize things? could you handle it if you weren't together? ask yourself these questions and make an educated decision.

    Answer by devtdbosombuddy at 3:03 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • Put it past you and have makeup sex.

    Answer by Iamasinglemom99 at 3:09 PM on Dec. 17, 2010

  • Sounds like a power struggle over a stupid book. But seriously, he can't read a chapter for you, and for the counselor? And he can't say sorry? Better think twice about that.

    Answer by spottedpony at 1:15 AM on Dec. 18, 2010