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Step parenting 101?

Some days it feels like my DH is being extra hard or too quick to get irritated with my kids (he is the step parent). I think part of me is just being defensive because I'm their mother and I don't like anyone else being harder than I can be on them. When I was with their father, he would constantly spank and yell and I didn't do anything but I guess it's because he was/is their biological father. But I want my kids to respect my DH and I want to give him the chance to be a parent. It's so confusing and such a tough situation! The thing is that he is not nearly as tough or harsh as their Bio dad is/was but it worries me because the kids could turn around and tell my family or their dad's family that my DH is mean to them which will create drama. He's never raised a finger or has been abusive which I watch carefully for. Any advice? Any similar stories?

I just need advice/understanding on the dynamics of a new family with a step parent.

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:46 PM on Dec. 19, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (1)
  • step-parenting is one of the most difficult jobs, its like walking thru a landmine due to trying to keep the kids in line and keep all sides of family happy too. we are defensive when our kids are disciplined by someone else. is your husband being too strict? you both need to sit down an establish the house rules and consequences of not following then notify the kids THEN STICK TO IT! i personally think its never ok for a step-parent to physically discipline a child unless they have actually raised the child from itty bitty. does you husband have kids himself? its more difficult for those who do not have their own children to deal with others. hang in there and just set the rules that you both approve of and follow thru.

    Answer by lillie70 at 2:02 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

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