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sick of feeling like a servant

I'm sick of feeling like a servant in my home. Dishes, laundry, cleaning - it never ends. And my DH never helps. I can't do it anymore. I just can't I feel like I gave up my great life to be a mother and servant. I don't have one kid - it feels like I have two - my bf and my son. I gave up school and work to feeling more exhausted than ever and thoroughly depressed. I just want to go backwards. I have to compromise my beliefs for this situation and I don't feel like I should. I've always been independent, always believed in a 50/50 relationship and I'm so damn tired of giving my heart and soul and basically my mind - because I feel like I'm going crazy. Please help.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:30 PM on Nov. 8, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • I understand completely! I told my family that I can't live here anymore unless something changes. We do not have a maid! I am working full time during the school year and I just can't keep up. Even in the summer, I have time to make good meals, live on a small budget and do things to take care of the house but right now I need everyone cleaning up after themselves. I honestly told my husband that if he doesn't clean up after himself I need to go away for awhile so everyone can take care of themselves and I get a break. He and my oldest do their own laundry. I use all disposables for cooking, serving and eating our meals. I have done alot of processed meals lately just to get me on track. It is exhausting. If you are a SAHM, I can relate because when I stayed at home, there were just more rounds of dishes, laundry and cleaning. Take a break anyway you need to and vent all you like to me!

    Answer by manna1qd at 10:36 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • when I feel like that I go on strike :) I only wash my clothes and my kids (2 1/2 and 1 so they can't do it them selves) clothes and fix food only for me and the kids. Hubby fends for himself.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:32 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • Welcome to my life!! LOL

    Answer by robinann5 at 10:42 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • marriage is like taking a bath, not so hot once you get used to it.

    i didn't realize when i said "i do", i do everything.

    see, you are not alone.

    Answer by CookieZenmilk at 10:49 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • It happens why dont you trying just washing your clothes and the kids and leaving his dirty maybe after a couple of timesof no clean clothes he will learn what a washer is,and do thesame with the dishes,there is only one way to skin a cat so to speak although Im not into being mean to animals.:)

    Answer by geenabelle at 10:54 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • LOL at Cookie -

    we aren't actually married - but we have been together for 7 years. I just need a mental break. My son has Down Syndrome and between therapy and doctors appointments and cooking, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping - I'm beginning to feel like either I'm not made out to be a domestic person or that my DH is not helping out like he should. I was never overly domestic - I always wanted a career -I have one more year of college before getting my degree. I feel so stuck. I want to get unstuck. I want to see the world and do things without a baby attached to my hip. I know that must sound horrible to some mothers. I love my son with all of my heart and I do everything for him. I just don't know how much I can keep giving without receiving anything in return. I don't mean material goods either. I mean love and support and thanks.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:55 PM on Nov. 8, 2008

  • that's how I feel most of the time with my four children. Fortunately my husband is helpful when he is home. 


    Answer by mommiedear at 12:08 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

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