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When your b/day comes around you get your gifts from family and friends then when their b/days come around yes you buy them gifts but do you feel like you are paying your gift back to them in a way it's like a circle

just wondering thanks!

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Asked by Anonymous at 6:29 PM on Dec. 19, 2010 in Just for Fun

Answers (10)
  • Uh, no. Then again I don't normally get anything for my birthday (which was last Monday) or Christmas. My dad did send me a violin (the only thing I got in the last 2 years for my birthday/Christmas). I do not in any way feel obligated to get him anything on his birthday. He doesn't really care and would rather I spend the money on something else than on him. I usually send him a card. Nobody else I know gets me gifts on my birthday, not even my husband.
    Nor do I expect gifts back if I happen to give to other people.

    Answer by justanotherjen at 6:32 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • I don't expect any, nor do I give any.. I guess it is a circle, and they got the idea,lol...

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 6:35 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • I never thought of it that way until I decided to stop gift-giving in my 20's. I let everyone know that I cannot afford gift-giving, and that I would not be participating in that ritual anymore. I also encouraged them to do the same. The fallout from that surprised me. I was told that I "owed" people gifts, that I would be mad if people stopped giving me gifts, etc....I stuck to my guns, and some people still give me gifts (and I graciously say thank you), a few seem to appreciate me dropping the obligation, some feel awkward and apologize, and some talk about me behind my back and are still angry (the rumors reach me sometimes)....I'm 46 now, and although I am firm about my policy, I now understand how I have upset people's worlds by actually doing what many people talk about and do not have the courage to do. It's a cultural tradition I am going against, and that seems immoral to some...

    Answer by Anna92464 at 6:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • No.

    I only give gifts because I want to give a gift. For whatever reason that is: birthday, holiday or just because.. I never give anything in this world in hopes of recipraction or out of some false idea that I must recipricate..

    Gifts are only gifts if they are given freely from the heart for no reason at all other than just to give and because you want to.. Giving for any other reason, isn't giving.. That's payback or wanting something in return. More of a "transaction" than true gift giving.

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • I don't buy a gift for anyone unless we have a relationship that warrants that (my brothers included). I buy gifts for people because I care about them whether they have ever bought me anything or not.

    Answer by jesse123456 at 6:39 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • my family alway forget b/day so i forget theirs

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 6:43 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • no one buys me so no

    Answer by hill2 at 6:43 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • I don't feel that way...I get what you're saying though.

    I have some friends that can't afford to give gifts outside of their children, and feel bad that they can't get me anything, but I still get for them. My DH actually asked me today why I still do even though I rarely get anything in return...he didn't mean it to sound selfish...and my reply was basically that it's better to give than to receive and one of those friends I know would if she could.

    Now for baby showers and things like that...I almost feel like I give too much, but I'm pretty much the last to have a baby, so part of me feels like what I bought people will kind of be given back in a way, if not given as hand me downs, which is more than fine...I know that may sound selfish of me, but I know for sure if we have a boy, we'll be getting a ton of stuff from my SIL and one of my best friends and DH best friends...

    Answer by dlandrum at 8:29 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • I don't expect any gifts, and I usually can't give any, so..*shrugs*

    Answer by -AJ at 12:15 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • this happened while I was growing up. My aunt would send me $2 in a card and my mom would send it back for my cousins bday. That went on for years! haha..the crazy things our parents did

    Answer by beyondhopes at 12:18 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

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