Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Is withholding christmas presents until a child proves he can behave child abuse?

My husband of 3 years has been in a custody battle with his ex mother in law over his son who just turned 6. His MIL chooses not to discipline the little boy for bad behavior. He is in kindergarten and has been in the principals office numerous times. This last week of school, he was sent to the office twice for disruptive behavior. He was subsequently sent home and not allowed back for the last day before Christmas break. The MIL has chosen not to punish him. We decided that as punishment he has to refrain from misbehaving in school for 2 weeks, before he can have his Christmas presents from us. She just called to inform us that she is calling the child abuse hotline on us. REALLY? What do you think?

Answer Question

Asked by a_brown23 at 6:30 PM on Dec. 19, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 11 (589 Credits)
Answers (26)
  • It's not child abuse. Have you thought about getting full custody? You can prove that she is not managing the childs behaviour in school and it's causing problems. It may be a really easy case.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 6:32 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • No not child abuse if he's misbehaving he shouldn't earn new toys

    Answer by raisingmen at 6:33 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • There are children whose parents can't even afford present. It is not a law that you have to give gifts to your children.

    Answer by layh41407 at 6:33 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • HAHAHAHA... I would just laugh at her. They aren't going to do anything,lol... I think it's a good idea, but I would also take away his favorite things he has already. I would also tell the boy if he doesn't straighten up that you or your Hubby will go to school and sit in his classrooom until he can behave on his own at school. It worked for our eldest a couple yrs ago when he was in the 6th grade..

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 6:33 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • You guys need to get full custody, not sure why that hasn't happened already! No that is not child abuse, that's like saying those who don't celerate or who cant afford Christmas are child abusers! What a dumb lady!


    Answer by kiansmom0423 at 6:35 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • No, that is so not child abuse! I am pretty sure gifts are privileges and not needs! I'd tell her to call but you want to be on 3 way with them so you can laugh you butt off as tell her she is wasting their time.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 6:35 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • It's not child abuse! You aren't causing ANY sort of emotional or physical damage to the child. Unless he is going to sit around the tree and watch other siblings open up gifts, then I don't see the big deal. I personally don't think I could ever go through with something like that, but you need to do what you feel is best to get his behavior on track.

    Answer by Luvmybooskies at 6:36 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • Yea...not child abuse....we can't afford christmas for my kids this am i abusing them.....i hope not!

    Answer by harris4 at 6:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • i wouldn't call it child abuse but mean but then i told my son if he doesn't behave that we are going to give them to the needy.... but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

    Answer by Lynnsae at 6:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • LOL. The CPS will just laugh. That is not child abuse.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.