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How can I 'make friends' with my sister-in-law?

I have been with my husband for over 7 years, either dating and / or married. His sister has barely said two words to me in all that time. She has lived out of the country for the past 2 years and she is moving back this week. Now that I have a 10mo old son I feel I need to 'be friendly' to his aunt.

Any advice?

Answer Question

Asked by lmt_mom2010 at 9:19 PM on Dec. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Level 17 (3,325 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Your situation sounds very familiar to mine. Have been with DH for 7 years. SIL lived abroad for a years. Now she's back. I have tried bonding with ehr, but we really don't have that much in common. The best way to somewhat connect has been spending time just me and her together. Usually dinner and a movie or going shopping... Good luck!

    Answer by isabellem at 9:22 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • All you can do is put yourself in a friendly position and leave it open for her to further want or not the relationship. She may simply be this type of person and it is not on you to FORCE yourself or your child upon her.

    Answer by gambilldl at 9:24 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • dont force it. it either happens or doesnt but be civil no matter what.

    Answer by bseastrand at 9:29 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • Well when she moves back you could call her up and ask her to go out to lunch with you, (or have her over to your house for lunch) and get to know her better. When my hubs brother married his 3rd wife, we did not know her very well and had only met her a few times. Well one day she called me up and asked if I wanted to go out to lunch, and I said yes. We sat and talked for 3 hours! It was nice to get to know her, find out more about her, and we discovered we have things in common. So now "Sis" (we call each other Sis) and I go out to lunch when schedules allow and catch up.

    Answer by MizLee at 9:33 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

  • All you can really do is be available and friendly and give her the chance to reciprocate. Hopefully she'll want to get to know you better too. But if not, don't take it too personally because it's probably nothing to do with you. Even if you two aren't fated to be best friends, I would just make sure to keep things friendly and cordial because it's best for the kids that way. We've never been close to my BIL and SIL for a variety of reasons (one of which is geography but there's a LOT more to it than that!) but the kids don't know the difference and don't expect anything more than a couple of visits a year. They get that and they're happy. There is some bad blood between dh's brother and dh and I, but we can keep things cordial enough so that it's not totally awkward to get together.

    Answer by Freela at 9:37 PM on Dec. 19, 2010

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