Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

11 Bumps

Are you aware of your avatar? (s/o of the spying question)

There are a few different sections this could go in, but I'm putting it here because it directly relates to this question from earlier.

It's obvious from how a lot of people behave online (specifically on CM, but it's on FB and message boards and everywhere else) that they don't give much thought to what they do.  Things like posting explicit sex questions with your kids showing as your profile picture - even if your profile page is set to private, that's still your kids' picture.  If you ask the question today and have a non-personal pic, forget about the question, and 6 months after you close it, change to a pic of your kids - that question is still out there.  At the other end of the spectrum is typical jr high behavior - doing catty things one moment and then denying them another, even though there's essentially a "permanent record" that is indexed and searchable online, not just here but for everything you do that's on the net.

Looking at the big picture - not just the possibility of your DH, your child, or some CM "rival" poking around your internet footprint - do you spend much time considering the consequences of everything you say and do online?  It's not something you can change by clicking an anon option on and off - I'm talking about a higher level of accountability where that isn't legally binding.  If someone in a civil suit subpoenead your history directly from the ISP or one of the assorted government databases that track clouds, would they unearth skeletons?  Would you have associations with people or idealogies that might paint you in a negative light?  (to use a CM example - do you constantly bump, vote up and agree with someone who is prone to hate speech, or a non-CM example - do you constantly visit and participate on a website whose owner is on assorted watchlists.  Not all gov't/law enforcement watchlists are terror related)

Before considering what info the gov't is "spying on you" to unearth, have you ever considered how much you are handing them on a silver platter before you post or click online?  (and feel free to substitute "divorce lawyer", "spouse", "child", "in-law", or "potential employer" for "gov't" - it's just varying degrees of access)

Answer Question

Asked by NotPanicking at 11:29 AM on Dec. 20, 2010 in Politics & Current Events

Level 51 (421,174 Credits)
Answers (19)
  • I say nothing online I would not say to someones face and if the government is waiting for my silver platter I did ask women what their favorite position was sexually and did write about my stbe lack of sex drive. He gets on my page all of the time and there is no reason to worry.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 11:39 AM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • Yup, I am aware of what I do online. I use internet marketing for my Counsellor and Life Coaching Business so I always check what is about me on the internet. It is really important because sometimes the internet mixes up your name with someone else's job and your reputation can be ruined in a second. And I totally agree with you that is important to check out our internet footprints time after time. Because in this world your digital profile is so important. Actually I know head hunters and companies, HR professionals, who search the applicants internet profiles before they employ them. If you have a bad reputation on the internet it can effect any aspect of your life.


    Answer by adriennfaklya at 11:41 AM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • Yup. That's why I'm almost always sorta nice. Sometimes I just can't keep my sarcasm in line, and do you like my avatar? I'm actually MUCH more sarcastic in real life, but my tone doesn't translate well to the written word.

    I only use the anon feature if I'm going into explicit details about some of the abuse I endured growing up, because well, I hate the idea that people will feel bad for me. Sometimes I feel like what I went through will really add to a conversation, but I don't want that "oh, poor lovin" bit. So that part is not really relevant.

    And I would never cheat on my husband, and I have a hard and fast line I draw when it comes to online conversations with men. Well, basically, I don't talk to them, except on facebook with people I've known for years, and those conversations MUST be public. I've closed out all chat accounts, including keeping my cm bar off, because that made DH uncomfortable.


    Answer by lovinangels at 11:43 AM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • I am very aware. I have had to use information before to put a restraining order in place. I was aware before the incident which helped me greatly.

    Answer by tiddliwinks at 11:48 AM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • My mom and I were talking about this over the weekend. She is worried that as opinionated as my sister and I and our Dad is that one of us is going to get into governmental trouble. I don't say anything on here (internet) that I don't say in person. Sometimes I do try to be a little nicer on here.

    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 11:51 AM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • I don't worry about the government "spying" on me, there are other people who much prefer to do that. Regardless, I don't use my kids as my picture and I don't post anything inappropriate so....

    Unfortunately, too many people DON'T care though.

    Answer by firenicecream at 12:13 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • I have no "real" pictures of myself or mine anyplace online.

    My child has never had his face online and I'm proud of that.

    No real names, no address, no phone number, no identifying info for the people.

    The government could find me, but I don't care about that.

    They're too busy screwing over the people to worry about little ole me.

    Answer by mustbeGRACE at 12:13 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • Yes, I am aware. My parents both worked for the gov't at different times in their lives, as did my exhusband. I'm sure there's already a file on me in some database somewhere, just because of that. If they want to investigate me for being Pagan, for researching criminology for the book I'm working on, or for simply being "wierd", well I guess that's just the riskI have to take in life.

    I can live in fear every day and never live, or I can recognize that life is inherently risky and try to avoid the most stupid and avoidable of the risks, and weigh the others against their benefits.

    Answer by geminilove at 12:17 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • I can live in fear every day and never live,

    Is it really living in fear? The flipside of watching your footprint - it may be an attorney or the government legally amassing your info - it can just as easily be an identity thief illegally amassing your info. I wouldn't consider it "fear" unless you count all common sense as fear - is it fear to look both ways before crossing the street?

    Comment by NotPanicking (original poster) at 12:21 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • My kitties are so in danger. LOL I really prefer the cute and cuddly. Anyway, you should always be careful of what you say online. You might have the FBI knocking at your door but I'm not going to throw out my 1st amendment rights because I am afraid someone is watching. Actually, they can kiss my lily white arse.

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 12:30 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.