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to go or not to go....

I don't have any contact w/my father.. I think he is an unreliable waste of space. But he did call to see if he would be able to see his grandchildren at Christmas. I don't think so, I don't want to take them over there so he can stare at them (which is all he wants to do really, to make sure they did not turn out fat like me or my husband, he has a fat bias). He is really not interested in them or me. They (kids 3 and 5) won't talk b/c they don't know him. So I say what is the point, I don't want to see him, they don't know him, I could just enjoy my whole day w/my mother and have a great day.

My husband says to suck it up and we will go over for an hour.. I don't know, I usually listen to husband b/c he is more level headed than I am. But it will be the most uncomfortable hour ever. I just know it.

 
Bubbie0809

Asked by Bubbie0809 at 2:44 PM on Dec. 20, 2010 in Relationships

Level 31 (47,643 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • You could always just send him a picture of the kids and say sorry you have other plans this year. Maybe next
    ReinaLuv

    Answer by ReinaLuv at 2:45 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • Go, do it for your kids, I never met my grandparents, and I missed out, you might be pleasantly surprised, and if not you can always leave.
    older

    Answer by older at 2:48 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • You should go.....regardless of what he may thinks of you and yur husband he still loves his grandkids and until he approaches you or the kids in a disrespectful way then suck it up and go......YOU ONLY GET 1 FATHER.
    mom42107

    Answer by mom42107 at 4:00 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • You're assuming that you know what his reasons are, you don't know. I totally agree with your husband (and with your assessment that your husband is more level headed). It's one hour out of your life. Go.
    Gaccck

    Answer by Gaccck at 5:36 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • So, go if you want to and don't if you don't. It really doesn't matter.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:45 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • Never count on "maybe next year". Never count on having a second chance. Life can change in an instant. Do what you can, while you can.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 5:40 PM on Dec. 20, 2010

  • Oh but he was never interested in being a father, he is way too selfish for that. I have unresolved childhood issues and I really can't stand to be around him.

    He never had any thoughts or good intentions towards me and mine in my life, I don't know why all of a sudden this Christmas he wants it to be different. My kids are 3 and 5, he didn't care before. I have seen him maybe a handful of times in the last 13 years. This is why I hate private caller on caller ID, my mom comes up that way so I always answer and this time it was him. If I would've know I would not have picked up.... urghhh!!
    Bubbie0809

    Comment by Bubbie0809 (original poster) at 5:40 PM on Dec. 20, 2010