Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Is it appropriate for your husband to address female co-workers using terms of endearment such as "honey", "babe", "cutie", etc..?

My soon to be husband works in a restaurant/bar and addresses the young female waitresses as "honey", "babe", "cutie", etc... I come from a background where using such terms of endearment is not appropriate in the workplace. Mind you the young waitresses also address him as such. But I don't expect young college girls to know what is and not appropriate. But I do expect my 49-year old fiance to know what is. I just think it is a form of flirting. We just moved here to Texas from California and he tells me it is a Southern thing. Well I work as well and none of my co-workers use such Southern terms. Any advice???

Answer Question
 
Gidget1972

Asked by Gidget1972 at 10:35 AM on Nov. 9, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (29)
  • Totally inappropriate. People get slapped with sexual harassment lawsuits for things like this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:36 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • IDK because I've done it. For example, if I'm in a store or on a bus and a man says, "Hello, or I'm sorry" if he's bumped into me accidentally, I've responded with "No problem babe", or "Hey babe, how are you" and my hubby knows and it doesn't bother him. So I think it depends on the person and what their boundaries are.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:39 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • I'm from the South and we use terms such as "Honey, Darling", it's part of our culture. Women use it more than men though down South. I think I would find the terms, "Babe or cutie" out of line. But then again, those that come down South think that "Honey and Darling" are out of line words also.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:46 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • It's called sexual harassment but it is unfortunately not enforced in bars/restaurants. In some it's actually expected and that's sad. Yes it's inappropriate. I'm Southern and have been in the work force for many years. I never had a boss or other employee call me that or I'd walk out but when patrons tried I told them real quick. "don't call me that. i have a name" He's being disrespectful to them and at that age it's just sad to think he perpetuates that kind of bad behavior. It creates a too familiar atmosphere that gives some men the idea they can be too familiar with them in other ways as well. It seems disrespectful to you as well imo. I'd ask him to cut the crap but that's just me.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:48 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • Nope
    JMGouge

    Answer by JMGouge at 11:01 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • if it makes you uncomfortable, he shouldnt do it. im sure if you were doing something that bugged him, he would want you to stop it. its just plain simple respect.
    hun i can understand...but cutie?? he should just say sexy if he's saying cutie.
    kiliki_malie

    Answer by kiliki_malie at 11:08 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • I would kick my husbands butt if he did that

    Christine113

    Answer by Christine113 at 11:32 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • My fiance works in a restaurant part time and if I found out he was doing that I would flip! Words like that are only for you
    avery408

    Answer by avery408 at 11:36 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • OMG. I have a major problem with this and I'll tell you why. I am not a jealous person, so it doesn't bother me in "that" way. My theory is, from experience, that guys that address all women this way tend to be the flirts, cheaters, liars. I believe they talk to so many women that they call everyone sweetheart and baby so they don't risk getting the name messed up. I would be very careful of this personality type. Think of every man you know that has this trait and look at their track record with women.
    hopelessnance

    Answer by hopelessnance at 11:38 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

  • Honey or darling, I could understand. Babe and cutie would be crossing the line, in my opinion. I live in Louisiana, born & raised... Like someone else said, he should just say sexy if he's calling these children (in comparison to his age!) cutie. At his age, he should know better. Tighten that leash! lol
    heather.huckaby

    Answer by heather.huckaby at 11:41 AM on Nov. 9, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN