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How do I stop the whiny behavior?

My 2 year old throws fits over EVERYTHING. He will throw a fit when he's hungry, then he'll throw a fit while he's waiting to eat, then he'll throw a fit that it's too hot, but throw a fit when i try to cool it down, he throws a fit when I tell him no, he throws a fit when I threaten him with punishment for throwing a fit....the tantrums just NEVER stop!! I feel like all day he's in time out for throwing fits, and the whole time he's in time out he's throwing a fit. I try to ignore it if he's not in time out but he will literally scream at the top of his lungs for a very long time. How do I get it to stop!? I feel like I have zero control over my child.

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:27 AM on Dec. 21, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (5)
  • Throw a tantrum too! Yell too show him you can do it to mine started that stuff out in public everytime we passed a candy if she couldnt have it she was throwing a tantrum so i did too and ppl did too when they passed even at home we all do it so she see's she not the only one doing it an now she does it but i give her a look like you want to do that? r u sure? and she just walks away :)

    Answer by premiemom18 at 1:35 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Turn on something LOUD like the vacuum or stereo etc - (even though it will be annoying to you) but act like you only hear that and not your child - IGNORE the requests of you child NO MATTER HOW INTENSE he gets! If he lays down in front of you; walk over him. If he carries on over his food take it away and place it on the counter explaining you can only eat when you are calm b/c that is when it is safe (stick to it) walk away and again IGNORE him begin your other loud activity - after a few days of this consistency he will figure it out that he is not getting your attention nor his way. Good luck (p.s. it does pass whew)!

    Answer by gambilldl at 6:56 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Spank his little butt and tell him that such behavior will not be tolerated in your home. He knows exactly what he's doing, and it's his way of controlling you. It will continue until you show him that you are the person in charge of your home. Better do it soon, because it won't get better on its own. Children need to have boundaries drawn for them, and they need to have those boundaries strictly enforced. That involves just a little bit of pain, the sting of their own disobedience, if you will. Spanking has gotten such a bad rap, and it's a real shame, because it is highly effective. My three adult children will testify to its very positive benefits and are now using it themselves. Self-control has to be taught, and it is one of life's most valuable lessons. He is old enough to understand the rules. And he is old enough to understand payment for breaking them.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:36 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Each of them has a "currency" which is THE most important thing to them. We used to take that away for an appropriate length of time as punishment. It won't necessarily be a toy. My youngest used to LOVE watching the trash truck. So, occasionally we would say he would not be allowed to watch it. Zero in on what makes him tick. Be Consistent!! Don't threaten something unless you really will do it. Like saying "you will never watch TV again". That is unrealistic and not something you can follow through on.

    Lastly, make sure they get enough one on one time with you and your SO. Plus praise when they do things right. This, along with positive reinforcement, goes a long way to making them feel special and lessen tensions. Lots of times kids go for the negative attention when they do not get enough positive attention. GL

    Answer by elizabr at 7:57 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • If my 2 year old is whining, I tell him I don't understand that tone of voice; when he's ready to ask nicely he can try again - and then I ignore any requests until the whiny tone goes away.
    If he's pitching a tantrum he goes to his room. I tell him when he stops yelling he can come out. It's very rare that he pitches a tantrum because he knows it doesn't get him an audience.

    Answer by missanc at 2:15 PM on Dec. 21, 2010

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