Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Moms of older children.. or even moms of younger children

Could you imagine letting your 30 year old son/daughter and their SO live with you rent/bill free (and no children) while they are out buying TVs, xboxes, new motorcycles, and all kinds of other unnecessary crap? I have sat and watched and listened to complaints about this from a family member for years and it makes me sick! Grow the hell up, stop buying toys, and get yourself an apartment and pay your rent like any other working adult out there. I know there are certain circumstances where times get rough and of course any mother will help out their "child" in a time of need, but this is just ridiculous! You better believe if my son is ever living in my home with his girlfriend when he is 30 years old I will be all over them making sure they are saving up the funds to get out on their own and start a life TOGETHER without depending on anyone else.

 
Ctink8189

Asked by Ctink8189 at 11:10 AM on Dec. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 21 (11,991 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Yes and that is called unsuccessful parenting. A successful parent is one who had equipped their child to survive without them in the adult world...we'll talk in about 30 years and see if I have met my own criteria...ha ha!

    There is no shame in helping out your child, but that "child" is really just taking advantage of their situation, which is sad. The parent needs to give them the boot!
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 11:21 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • The parents are simply the enablers. Some ppl are ok with this but I def wouldnt be. Its disrespectful and just hurting the "child" in the end.
    Steph319

    Answer by Steph319 at 11:14 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • I take a what would bob do approach. whoever this person is needs to drop the hammer and start charging rent and making a housework schedule and see how this might encourage them to move out.
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 11:18 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • I just recently witnessed the same situation with a friend of ours....how can the kids be that inconsiderate of their own parents?! I don't get it. And how can the parents put up with that?
    Kword

    Answer by Kword at 11:12 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • I have seen it as well. I sure don't understand it why they let them stay at home rent free and get away with it! The buying of big kids toys..no rent .. gets my dander up! That would never fly at our house as we grew up being held responsible with the pride to work to do it on your own!
    officemgr59

    Answer by officemgr59 at 11:16 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Yeah I agree. If my 30 year old son (he's 3 now, so there's a long way to go for that), were to live with his dad and I, he had better be working and contributing to the household. There would be ground rules set and he would not be allowed to blow that money on frivolous items, at least not before he paid his share of rent, utilities, food and whatever.


    But at 30, I really hope he's out on his own, taking care of his own family.

    thatgirl70

    Answer by thatgirl70 at 11:21 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Well, if the parents are allowing it, then I guess you could say that is how the children were raised, which is why they do it. "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree", y'know? So if mom and/or dad don't want junior living there, then they need to stop enabling junior and start acting like parents, like they should have done in the first place.
    mom2aspclboy

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 11:24 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Nope. My children all know that upon graduation from high school, they are to either be enrolled full time in a university or local community college OR get a job and contribute to the household expenses.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 11:39 AM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • My aunt is like this and thinks nothing of it. She says she can afford to pay their bills so why should they move out. Why? Because they're 30 years old, that's why!!!
    ceallaigh

    Answer by ceallaigh at 12:04 PM on Dec. 21, 2010

  • Exactly.. and he really just doesn't seem to care. Always on Facebook posting about video games and stuff that he has bought. Just put up pictures of the new Harley Davidson he bought last week. I'm pretty sure the cost of that Harley would pay my rent for almost a year straight!
    Ctink8189

    Comment by Ctink8189 (original poster) at 11:17 AM on Dec. 21, 2010