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I am SOOOOOOOOO pissed at myself! When will I ever learn? adult content

I went to the Dr. (a specialist I had never been to before) for my diabetes. Things went well til he asked me to strip down and he'd be right back. The hair stood up on the back of my neck. I was raped almost 5 yrs ago - but I DO NOT have "naked exams" anymore. I asked him to please send the nurse in first. Another nurse comes in and I tell her "I cannot do this". She goes out and talks to the Dr. who says he wants to look over my skin to see what if any rashes or spots I have. (I had already answered his question about this before - there are one on my left leg and one on the top of each foot - I would pull up my jeans and take off my socks for him to see. Nope, that won't be necessary he'd said.)

Well, I can tell you me sitting there ass naked isn't going to help him see it any better. Ummm, I thought this was an appointment about my diabetes?! The nurse comes back. "He really needs to examin you so if you just...." I interupt her: "You are not understanding me - I CANNOT DO THIS". "Well, why not?" I said "I don't feel comfortable telling you". She says well, "I'm sure you've been examined before". I said "I'm not going to get in a pissing match with you - I told you I cannot do this and...." She cuts me off "Well you have to..." Finally I blurted out to her as I began to cry "I was raped, ok? Is that good enough for you? Will you STOP asking me to do something I cannot do?!" Then she walks out - slamming the door!

She comes back in "I told the Dr. what you told me" (GREAAAAAAAT thank you so very much bitch!) "and he says he would be committing malpractice if he doesn't examin you, so..." as she shoves the "gown" and "paper" at me "DAMMIT! I said NO!" I yelled - and ran out of the office. I went to the front desk where I registered. I was in full blown panic attack....couldn't breathe.....crying histerically.

I don't even remember what I said to the lady but she got her supervisor who took me to her office and she called my husband at work. When she heard me tell him what happened she brought another lady in who is bringing it to the attention to the board.

I was doing so good! I hadn't had a panic attack in MONTHS! I am angry at myself for telling that nurse why I couldn't be examined. Why can't I keep my big mouth shut?

Don't know where to put this...

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:34 PM on Dec. 22, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (22)
  • I think you need some help to gain a little self-control. The nurse doesn't sound like she was very pleasant but you weren't exactly proper in the situation either. I'd suggest talking to someone who can help you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:38 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • You had every reason to tell her why you wouldn't take off your clothes. SHE had NO RIGHT to tell the doctor. They should both be in trouble for making you feel this way.
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 2:38 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I'm so sorry. I can't believe they weren't more understanding! I think you had to tell them, so they knew you weren;t just be stubborn, but why the hell weren;t they more caring? Find another doctor.
    EverydayMomma

    Answer by EverydayMomma at 2:39 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Anon, I am sooooooooo abundantly sorry I wasn't "proper in the situation". It has nothing to do with her pleasantness. It has to do with saying "NO" repeatedly....just like when I was raped. Don't answer questions you know nothing about.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:40 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • You didn't exactly ask a question for anyone to answer.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:41 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I can understand how that upset you. My DD who was killed was raped, and she would not tell even us for 2 yrs and then no one else. This I might add caused drugs and alcohol problems. When she did have to tell a physchistrist (sp)t to get meds, it was an assault, not the word rape. If she were alive she would shoot me for even writing this, so DO NOT be upset at yourself, be upset w/ them. They had no right to push you, and especially after you explained it to the Nurse. She should have asked you if she could tell the Dr. first. Hopefully they both will be reported, and you will find a Dr. who will treat you with dignity. So sorry for your pain in both situations, and I hope you can have a full recovery of some sort. Merry Christmas anyway.
    MyAngel003

    Answer by MyAngel003 at 2:43 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Anon#2, then why are you wasting time in this "question-less" post?! Surely you have brains and brilliance to spread elsewhere. Or maybe you are a bitch and enjoy it when others are upset and you like to make them feel worse. yeah, i bet thats it!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:44 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • OP, don't let them upset you any more than you are. They're obviously people who enjoy making other's feel bad. Not worth your time.
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 2:47 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I think you need some help to gain a little self-control. The nurse doesn't sound like she was very pleasant but you weren't exactly proper in the situation either. I'd suggest talking to someone who can help you.
    I wonder if the above comment was made by someone raped, or someone who had a daughter raped, or just someone who has no idea on the subject, question or not. Very insensitive remark
    MyAngel003

    Answer by MyAngel003 at 2:49 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Thanks tararenee...I feel like everyone can see that i was raped just by looking at me. everywhere i go. no matter if i talk to them or not.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:49 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

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