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What are my rights as the stepmom?

I am having issues with my husbands ex not wanting me to be involved with my twin stepsons. She has blocked my phone number from her phone, refuses to talk to me at all, and will not let me pick up my stepsons by myself. I haven't ever given her a reason for this other than the occasional disagreement, but never anything to harm or affect the kids. My husband works ALOT and is gone alot for work and it would be nice to be able to pick up the boys so that they can spend time with there little sister.

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jenshandy

Asked by jenshandy at 2:51 PM on Dec. 22, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 2 (7 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Unfortunately I don't think you have any rights. Your ex may need to go to court to have everything outlined in a court order.

    skittles1108

    Answer by skittles1108 at 2:53 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I would think when they are in the care of our husband you have full rights. When the boys are with you two the mother can't control what your do.
    Snewo

    Answer by Snewo at 2:53 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Unfortunately, you have NO rights as a step mom. It's sad that she cannot see that you only have the kids' best interests at heart.

    But, as the mom, she can dictate that you cannot pick up the kids without your DH.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 2:54 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Stepparents' rights vary from state to state but are very limited. Your husband should get the court order modified to allow you to pick them up.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 2:56 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I do believe that you can pick up the kids for dad's court ordered time... that's the only one I don't think she can block... although you'd have to read the CO and your state laws to make sure...
    other than that... NOPE... you don't have "rights" you are NOT their mother and she doesn't need to talk to you AT ALL... all discussions about the kids should be b/w dh and her.
    When they are in your house you get to love and care for them... any MAJOR discpline (other than time out etc) should be by dad.
    MamiJaAyla

    Answer by MamiJaAyla at 2:57 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Usually, legally, you have absolutely no rights. Read the court agreement. It will say what the father can do, but that doesn't include you. It may not seem right, but that's usually the legal part of it. It would make it easier for you if she were more cooperative, but you have to abide by what she wants. You mentioned occasional disagreements. Fair or not you are at her mercy, and she can make your life very difficult. If I were you, I would try to be really nice, and never say anything about her in front of the kids, and maybe in the future, when things have calmed down, she will be more ameanable.
    SweetLuci

    Answer by SweetLuci at 3:03 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Why has hubby not adressed this with his ex? If he wants you to pick them up then he needs to speak up for you and your (his) daughter.
    mom2priceboys

    Answer by mom2priceboys at 4:29 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

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