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4 Bumps

anyone married... but have a child w/ someone previously.......and still think about them or how their life would have been?

My husband is a wonderful dad, wonderful in law to my family........ but he is not a wonderful husband. He's not even an imperfect wonderful husband. He puts very little time into our marriage, just enough to keep me from thinking something is going on I think. He is married to his work. He works for government, and thats where he is more than home.. when he's home, hes w/ the kids for the most part.. which i think is wonderful, he is seriously one of the greatest fathers, and that makes me VERY happy. All his effort goes to them, and i love it. I know many arent like that & he's such a blessing that way.

However, we are recently married. both have children from previous relationships, not marriages. and we have a child together, and one on the way. I am constantly getting second handed when it comes to my SD mother. its like she makes all the shots, she is in total control of when he see's his daughter, so we are always doing things around his ex. she is taking advantage, and im warn out from it.

My husband kisses me just before he goes to sleep, when he leaves, always says i love you when he hangs up the phone, but theres never anything new. never any flowers, and spontanious anything, he's so busy w/ his work he doesnt have much time for me.

Since we got married its just gotten worse, im a stay at home mom, and i feel like a complete single mom.

Sometimes, because my ex was so sweet to me, wrote me cards, did sweet things for me, I often think about him, and wonder how he is doing. He see's our daughter, but not as often as he should. he has been coming around a lot more lately.. he's had some trouble in his life, and hasnt been the greatest dad, like my husband is!

Even when the husband and I are "extra loving" I often wonder if I will always have feelings for "my first love, my high school sweetheart"


Asked by Anonymous at 9:27 PM on Dec. 22, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • why did you leave your ex? and if you dont think its getting any better than are you sure you want to stay? i am all for families but your not happy and if your not happy you should see why and fix it :) i have a horrible man and he is a wonderful dad so i no what you mean but if im not happy i tell him and you are already thinking about ur ex so maybe you should think about where you wana be to be happy :) good luck if you wana share stories of our bad husband great daddies message me :)

    Answer by premiemom18 at 4:37 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • I don't know but I'll give you a bump :(

    Answer by DancerMomof2 at 9:40 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I think it's normal to wonder sometimes, after all at one time all of our dreams for our future revolved around that person and our children. We never pictured the new dad and new kids.

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 10:33 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • i do, and no i don't. my ex tried to kill me and my son when i was 4 weeks prego with him. that was 5 yrs ago, and im still hoping to see him dead on the news!!! lol

    Answer by mama2bof2 at 9:12 AM on Dec. 23, 2010