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Would you rearrange plans on for Christmas so your mom can hang out with her abusive boyfriends family?

My mom is pissing me off right now

She is trying to revolve our Christmas around her boyfriends families plans. She is annoying the hell out of me. We always do Christmas, gift Opening, at her house in the morning. Then I usually hang out with my sister, who is still living with her, until the afternoon, and then we go to my grandpa's house for dinner.

She is now trying to alter the plans because her boyfriends family are doing Christmas as a family and she is so desperate to fit in with them that she is trying to ditch us.

Not to mention this is her grandsons 2nd Christmas, the first one he was a little over a month old. She was looking forward to that.

Her BF cheats on her, hits on her, got back with his ex wife while they were together, just so much stuff. The list will go on and on.

The way she wanted to alter Christmas was
1. Do gifts at her house on x-mas eve(which won't work for us because it's not our tradition and even if we wanted to be nice, my hubby is working)
2. Go to her house, stay there for a couple hours and then that's it. So that way its open presents and good-bye. huh? xmas isn't all about presents
3. Her just drop off all the presents here and do nothing.

I basically told her if her boyfriend was so important that she is going to bail on her actual FAMILY then I don't even want to do anything with her.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:41 PM on Dec. 22, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I would got your mom's house and open presents with your sister. Forget about your mom for now. Then do what you usually do. If she really wants to change tradition, let her be the one to change. Good luck your majesty.

    krissyvelazquez

    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 11:08 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Wow i agree with you...priorities are mixed up!
    harris4

    Answer by harris4 at 10:43 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Oh and before ppl harp on her abusive BF, I have called the cops too many times, they never do anything. But the neighbors and my sister have some understanding that if she calls the neighbor and hangs up to call the police. If I could kick him out for her I would. He's a POS
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:43 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • well i say this if your mom dont want to spend christmas eve with you then dont spend it with her she dont deserve it im sorry your mom is putting her bf before you & her grandchildren but you deserve better i hope your holidays turn out ok for you & your kids
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 10:50 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • your sister shouldnt be in this situation.. i dont know how old she is.. but she doesnt need to be around that. i agree and I dont.. when you got married your hubby altered his plans to fit with yours thats how it works.. your mom shouldnt be ripped of this right just because she is your mom.... but if he is such a pos then she shouldnt want to alter her plans for her family.
    Ross2010

    Answer by Ross2010 at 10:50 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • Your mom must care about this man or she wouldn't be living with him. It sounds like she has had many of opportunities to get rid of him and hasn't. This is how she has choosen to live her life. Even though it may not be your choice for her. Traditions can be broken for many reasons; marriage, divorce, illness and even death. Let her go. Have her come over to your house to open gifts and you all have burnch and bid her farewell - then you go to Grandpa's house. My mom and I have had the same tradition for 15 yrs. at Christmas time. Well guess what, she died this past July and now I don't have her at all EVER AGAIN. You be the adult and make it work while making good memories for the children.
    DansBabe

    Answer by DansBabe at 11:04 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I think it's pretty obvious that my sister doesn't need to be around that, but like I said, no matter how many times the police are called, nothing happens. She's a young teen, so she is in her room a lot, and I mean A LOT.

    We just already decided as a family how holidays work. Thanksgiving we go to other families houses. So we go to hubbies on thanksgiving, she goes to her bf's, my sister goes to my grandpas. On Christmas it's supposed to be us as a family again.

    I'm just going to give her the ICE COLD SHOULDER ... and I can be one Ice Queen if you KWIM
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:05 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • I'm sorry, but she has some sick addiction to this man. I could give a damn how much she cares about him. When a man puts his hands on you, doesn't seek help to change, continues to cheat on you, is never home, and you sleep in different rooms, thats where I draw the line, I can't even be tolerant of him.

    How strongly I feel about it, he is not allowed to be near my son ever, even if it means not coming over.

    and FYI he is very open about him using her for $$$ he has no shame
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:07 PM on Dec. 22, 2010

  • lol thanks I will need it. I have my hands full
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:21 PM on Dec. 22, 2010