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7 Bumps

Are they allowed to ask this in family court?

I have recently went on food stamps for me and my dd. I have filed for a modification of child support since my ex is now making a lot more money then he was when the order was signed. He is saying he wants to change the visitation order as well. We will go to mediation first but if we can't work it out, we will have to go before a judge. If we do, can my ex or his lawyer ask if I am on public assistance? If they do, do I have to answer? And if I do have to answer will it be held against me. I am only getting food stamps not medicaid or cash assitance. I go to school full time and I went on them because I truly needed them, I am not just trying to scam the system. Please, no bashing I just need some answers.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:04 AM on Dec. 23, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (25)
  • I'm not sure so I'll bump you. But, if your S/O gave you enough support, maybe you wouldn't need food stamps. Food for thought there !!
    MyAngel003

    Answer by MyAngel003 at 12:07 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • I don't see why they would even ask this. It wouldn't affect how much child support he has to pay. If they ask, just ask how that is relevant to the case.
    badgirl44654

    Answer by badgirl44654 at 12:08 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • From my experience, the amount of support you get from your ex will be the same regardless of your public aid. However, your public aid will change if your support amount changes. Make sure you tell you caseworker right away of changes or you may owe the state cash for the food stamp value they have given you.
    babyboyzz

    Answer by babyboyzz at 12:10 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • I don't understand why they would ask it and to what benefit to them it would be to know if you are or not on food stamps.
    CABlonde

    Answer by CABlonde at 12:11 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • I do believe when child support is adjusted, they ask for all forms of income for both parties. In my daughter's case, the amount received in food stamps did count but it didn't "count against her" or make it look like she wasn't taking care of my grandson.

    Good luck, I hope you're able to reach a fair agreement quickly - it's so awful when these cases get so intense everyone is more stressed. Sure makes a less than ideal situation even worse.

    Good job :) sounds like you're working hard to give your little one everything you possibly can :)
    AAAMama

    Answer by AAAMama at 12:11 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • Well he also wants to change the amount of visitation and prob even grandparents visitation which is really hard to get in my state (he can't get custody cause he is military and he is single) and to get as much as possible, I am wondering if he will try to make me look as bad as possible. I way I see it, I am doing nothing wrong, I am eligable, I didn't lie on my application, but I am worried that the judge might see it as I cannot take care of my child. I am a good mom, things are just hard right now.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:12 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • I also don't see why they would ask, and the only thing it should affect, if anything, is how much in food stamps you get.
    the.lilangel

    Answer by the.lilangel at 12:12 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • Yes they can AND WILL. You DO have to answer the question. It may or may not look bad for you. Usually if you are working to better yourself the judge will not frown on you for it.

    This was a HUGE issue in my parents custody battle because my mom had lots of assistance. The will look at who is more financially stable and depending on your situation it can affect you.
    miasmommy21407

    Answer by miasmommy21407 at 12:17 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • Hun, if you weren't taking care of your child, you wouldn't be on food stamps to feed him. Don't worry, most people wouldn't choose to need the resource but when we get in hard spots, it can make a ton of difference.

    I am sure you'll be just fine :)
    AAAMama

    Answer by AAAMama at 12:19 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • The reason why I am asking is we will go to mediation first. It will just be him, his lawyer, me and the mediator. There, I don't HAVE to answer anything except what they ask on the forms that they send you (and it doesn't ask) so if they are gonna ask, I should prob try to settle in mediation. I plan on doing that anyway but I guess it is a little extra insentive
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:21 AM on Dec. 23, 2010

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