Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

When u shop for clothes/ pick out an outfit does your man give his opinion?

First of all im kinda venting and being thankful for my man. Please dont be harsh. Im not shallow neither is my SO. He loves me in my sweats w no makeup and will take me out like that...I just wont let him.LOL We have very few problems and this being really the main one at the same time I know im lucky he is this way. Its kinda long but I just want to explain and see what other woman think about it along w if they have this issue/wonderful quality in their man!
So I wanted some platform pumps for xmas. for my dress that day im short and love adding xtra hight when wearing a dress. My SO did SOME shopping for me. Then decided either way he wants to take me shopping and get me some things. I hate doing this for 2 reasons 1. is its part of my xmas and theres no suprize 2. We dont agree....
So 1st try at the mall all I can think about is the shoes I want and a cute shrug/cardigan for my dress. Well he thinks I cant walk in them cause I dnt wear heels often and he hates how shrugs look on anyone. So he refuses to let me decide at that point. after many stores and a bag full of barets(my fav hat) im whinning like a spoiled teen and hes pissed. Next day at kohls huge sale he wants to by me boots I have 6 pairs already but very few heels(outdated). So I encourage him and try them on....I like...then he picks another pair and another...all cute. So 4 pairs later were at the pumps. 25.00 I try on and almost fell but these were 4 in w a not so flat plat form in the front and the heel was stick thin. I tell him no not these I will need to find a more stable pair. He doesnt care at all. So on to the clothes Im looking at shrugs and cardigans but he only cares about what he wants for me. Yes he picked out some very nice sweater dresses w leggins to match....So I gave in I agreed I compromised but he is not willing at all to let me pick/decide for myself.
So in the end I come home tried on my xmas dress and skirt outfit w a pair of ankle boots he insisted will look good and no need to by the paltform pumps. Well they didnt look good w dress or skirt and he tells me that dresses and skirts are not my thing cause they make me look younger(i get his point and know its true) which is not good cause hes a bit older than me. So Itry on all the boots and clothes he picked out. I Love them all very flatering for me considering im small they actually show I have a figure. so Im wearing one of the outfits he picked out for xmas day. Im only upset that those are outfits Id wear any day if leaving the house. I Love dressing up and those arent to dressy for anything. So I dont get to go all out kinda dressy for xmas which is only one of a few times I have an excuse to really be dressy.
Im very happy and thankful for all that he does for me and that he wants me to look my best. I think im really lucky to have a man who cares that much and can go shopping with or for me. In the end we do agree and I agree all along but have to go in to brat mode when I cant have a say in my own style and he wont even consider. And I do shop w out him and I pick out stuff he likes on me. I do have style and taste on my own. So there is a positive to this and a negative. I want him to continue shopping w me and for me. I love that!
Although after 51/2 yrs together he has finally learned that I cant wear womans,misses, or petite sizes. I have to shop in juniors but oviously the more sophisticated and classy section so I can represent being a mom. But He still complains he doesnt like my tight jeans, there not tight tight just form fitting. But the outfits he picked out are leggings and sweater dresses that are snug and very form fitting....and I like! He knows me and thats wonderful but as styles and seasons change so do I. I just want him to accept that. If I dont look good or he feels its embarassing then by all means I wont wear it. I do want to look good for myself and for him. I love love love when he likes what he sees.
What is your man like when it comes to shopping, or when u pick out what u want to wear from your closet? Does he buy clothes for u or have an oppinion? Does he pick out any of your gifts on his own...all,some or none? DO u make a list and he pick things from there? And w/o being mean am I being a brat sometimes or to easy to control. Is there a wrong or right way to handle/deal w this.


Asked by Anonymous at 12:01 PM on Dec. 23, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • I apologize, but I had to stop reading. Why? Because I don't have that kind of money to frivolously spend on myself and I don't like reading about others WASTING money on clothing they really don't need.

    Vote me down, if you want to, but I find that it's depressing to read about others talking about their spending habits ("I don't really like the 4 pairs of boots I bought but I love the heels that I really want") when I can't even afford to buy my own daughter her Christmas gifts this year. We've been depending on our family and friends to make my daughter's Christmas a good one this year.

    While you may be asking if we appreciate our husbands' opinions when shopping, it sounds like you just needed an excuse to BRAG about all the money you just spent.

    To answer your question, I value what my husband says about the clothes and shoes I wear (notice I didn't say BUY; can't afford it). He knows what looks best on me.

    Answer by _Tam_ at 8:16 PM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • He loves to shop on his own for me. Luckily he has excellent taste and usually picks out cuter clothes than I would have picked out for myself.
    Of course I also shop for my own basics when I need them and I shop for him as well.

    As far as picking out what I wear on a daily basis, no, he doesn't control that. If we are going out he may suggest a dress he likes, but otherwise I dress myself.

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 12:10 PM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • If you marry someone for money, you earn every penny. You can always leave if not being able to do big-girl things like choose your own clothing is a deal breaker.

    Answer by yogapantz at 12:55 AM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • Your sugar daddy should throw some money at your inability to write coherent sentences, use punctuation and find the spell check button. Beauty fades, stupid is forever.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:27 AM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • He picks out his own and I pick out my own. I'll ask what he thinks but regardless on what he thinks I'll buy the outfit if I like it on me. I don't tell him what to buy when he gets he's clothes so he wont be telling me what to buy when I get my clothes

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 12:04 PM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • Orionsgirl.....I feel we are both lucky. Most woman I know pick out all their gifts, they never get their SO's oppinion or help and most of the time the SO is like I dont care, whatever, looks fine...and so on. But just to clarify he never picks out what I wear! He is suggesting an outfit he picked out for me to wear xmas day. which is the 1st time he had came up w an idea of his own and decided to tell me. But i always pick out my clothes. and for nights out or special days I go in my closet and pick stuff out and will ask his oppinion and then I pick one then ask if its looks ok of its appropriate for our plans and so on. Thats when he will chime in w ideas or say its great. But as for shopping...thats different he simply just wants to pick items he likes and will look good on me. its not a matter of deciding what i will wear for certain days or with what.

    Comment by mymestey (original poster) at 12:32 PM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • dh buys them alone

    Answer by san78 at 1:13 PM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • I don't think you are being a brat at all! My S.O. used to pick out clothes for me, things he would like to see me in, but he never tries to make me wear anything or NOT wear something. He knows I have my own style and he respects that. Maybe you should try to tell your husband that you appreciate him picking out and buying clothes for you but that you have your own specific style that you like and could he please try to lean more towards that style when he is shopping for you. Good luck!

    Answer by Platinum_Mommy at 1:30 PM on Dec. 23, 2010

  • My husband picks out things for me all the time. But its not all about what he likes. Mt husband has awesome taste so most of the things he picks out I am like wow very nice. But if he sees something online that he is unsure of he will ask my opinion and I'm like yeah or no. He picks really nice shoes also so it works out well for me. But I don't think u are being a brat. He has to value what u feel and not go based just on what he wants. Especially if u don't need it. I would sit down and talk about this when u both are calm and u can discuss entirely how ur feeling.

    Answer by True_Gator_77 at 11:04 PM on Dec. 23, 2010