He is gone a lot, and I am not sad because of that...I am sad because of the way he treats me. Nothing I do is good enough and I try so hard.
I work almost as many hours as he does, yet I do EVERYTHING. Bills, cleaning, laundry, homework, carpooling, shopping, scheduling vehicle maintenance, cooking, planning any outings and finding babysitters. You name it, I do it...ALL.
On the days he works and I am actually home I make him a fresh pot of coffee, set his uniform out, set out a fresh towel, pack his lunch and make sure the vehicle has gas in it for him.
But when I have to get ready for work he can't be bothered to help with the kids or try to pack me a little lunch. On his days off he can't even manage to do the dishes. I set the trash out at night so he could take it to the dumpster for me so I don't have to leave our children alone in the house to trek across the subdivision. I don't ask much of him AT ALL, I think doing the dishes one or two days a week and taking the trash seems pretty minimal.
However, when I ask for a little help he tells me I am selfish and that what I do is nothing compared to the schedule that he works and if I continue to bitch he will quit his job and show me just how much he does do. I feel that many wives don't do nearly what I do for him and he should count his blessings.
I go back and forth between feelings of anger, resentment and just plain hopelessness. Is there no light at the end of this tunnel?I realize that I have created this monster by babying him so much...but is there really no end in sight? Will i be this miserable and used for the rest of my life?
Asked by Anonymous at 9:24 PM on Dec. 23, 2010 in Relationships
Answer by Anonymous at 9:27 PM on Dec. 23, 2010
Answer by ready4baby2011 at 9:27 PM on Dec. 23, 2010
Answer by bseastrand at 9:27 PM on Dec. 23, 2010
Answer by kc932 at 9:29 PM on Dec. 23, 2010
Answer by CABlonde at 9:30 PM on Dec. 23, 2010
Answer by CABlonde at 9:31 PM on Dec. 23, 2010
Don't gas up his car, don't do HIS laundry, don't pack his lunch, or make his coffee for a while. Do what you need to do for you and your kids. Don't be mean or spiteful about it...just stop doing it. When he says something tell him you've been trying to discuss the issue with him w/o any help so you had to make a decision and that is what you decided.
Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 9:35 PM on Dec. 23, 2010