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Anyone else have a child who is going to be 18 when they are a senior, and turn 19 that year?

My sd was held back one year. She starts senior year at 18. It's just weird because legally she will be an adult. Do we still buy her everything, or do we make her buy her own stuff since it is our job to teach her to be an adult? I bought anything I wanted when I was in high school and I worked. What's your opinion?

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Asked by JackieGirl007 at 11:10 PM on Dec. 24, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 35 (73,191 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • At 18, unless she is in some serious Honors classes that bury her with 4 hrs of homework every night she needs at least a part time job. You pay for school clothes, shoes, food, room and board. Entertainment, vehicles, cell phone..SHE pays for.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:15 PM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • Both of our boys turned 18 their senior year and I like you had to buy everything I needed after I turned 18, but with our boys I felt as long as they were in school it was our job as their parents to buy what they needed for school. They had to get a job to pay for cell phone & car insurance though..And they were awesome about it :)

    Answer by Kathy675 at 11:17 PM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • I'd say a kid should be learning to work at start taking responsibility to pay for odds and ends for themselves before they even reach 18.

    Answer by Adelicious at 11:18 PM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • My brother is going through that. He just turned 18 and is a junior. My parents treat him like he is the age he should be for his grade. He got held back in kindergarden so it's not like he is just a bad student or something. He pays for his extras (dates, extra clothes) just as I did at his age (well obviously not dates lol) but my parents buy him enough clothes for school and he lives my dad.

    Answer by JLS2388 at 11:20 PM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • Ya, she pays for stuff now but just extras, she doesn't buy her own clothes or anything. All of my kids have to earn things they want. She is SO immature though and has never had a job. Do I demand that she gets one? I don't see how she is ever going to move out of here unless it's straight in with a guy she can mooch off of which is the last thing in the world I would ever want for her. It's so stressful! I am almost hoping that she moves out before she graduates but that is just the selfish part of me. The mom part of me wants her to graduate, and work hard to get and stay on her feet. Her mom and dad are no help at all really I don' t think either one gives a crap. Her bio mom doesn't even talk to her and her dad just exists in her life and doesn't really teach her anything.

    Comment by JackieGirl007 (original poster) at 11:25 PM on Dec. 24, 2010

  • My brother will turn 18 a week after his senior year of high school starts. My parents will treat him like a teenager as long as he is in school. Another friend of mine has a son who turned 18 a month after his senior year started. He makes his own rules, but he's in sports so he doesn't work during sports seasons. I think that's wrong. As long as your children are in high school, they should be treated as such.

    Answer by corbysmom531 at 12:21 AM on Dec. 25, 2010

  • My oldest turned 17 a few days after he started the 12th grade but his brothers turned 19 during the 12th grade (he was held back in grade 1), turned 19 a few days before he started the 12th grade (due to Aspergers Syndrome he started K at 7) and turned 18 a few mos. after he started the 12th grade. Just because they were legally adults didn't mean we expected them to be adults (they didn't pay rent) and they still had rules, curfews and still got grounded all the way through high school. All 4 of my sons had jobs while in high school. The oldest started woring in between the 11th and 12th grade because he was only 15 the summer in between the 10th and 11th grades but the other 3 started working the summer before they started the 11th grade. All were expected to pay for their own car insurance, gas for their car and wants. We took care of the basics and their needs & anything school related.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:24 AM on Dec. 25, 2010

  • I think parents should get their kids through high school so you buy her stuff but if she works, teach her to save for college or to move out!

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:26 AM on Dec. 25, 2010

  • I turned 18 my senior year b/c of starting late b/c of my b-day. I had a part-time job but my parents still pd for everything. THey felt b/c I was still in school...they should see me through that.

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 9:00 PM on Dec. 25, 2010

  • I would get what she needs for school, but she needs to get a part time job at least to get extra things that she might want, And I think she needs you in her life if her parents aren't there for her. Thats sad that they don't care. So be strict enough, but be there for her.

    Answer by Alta2008 at 7:57 PM on Dec. 26, 2010

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