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Is it wrong to keep your child from seeing his dad?

So I am pregnant and the baby's daddy told his parents that I am pregnant, so his parents hate him and me because I am pregnant. They literally won't talk to him. His parents are very religious and they don't believe in having kids before marriage, they are Muslim. He in the other side isn't much of a participant because well, here I am with this problem. Me with fear of his parents, and the stuff that he told me about his sister wanting to fight me, and threatening me to kill me. I moved out of the place I was living, quit my job since we both work in the airport, moved to a different city, changed my cell phone number deleted my Internet profiles (facebook, myspace). Literally disappearing.

The baby's father wanted me to get an abortion and I chose not to because I don't care if I have to work like a slave to take care of the baby, it's another life inside me, i don't need help from his father neither get Child Support from him. The problem here is when my baby one day asks me "Who is daddy?" I know it will break my heart into many pieces ;(

what do u moms think?

 
vall11

Asked by vall11 at 1:30 AM on Dec. 27, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 9 (347 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Something to remember. Anyone can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a daddy. There is someone out there that will love you and your child much more than the biological father ever could.
    amber1330

    Answer by amber1330 at 2:21 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • I think in this situation it is safer and better to just raise the kid on your own. You never know you could meet the man of your dreams and he could adopt your kiddo.
    tymma11

    Answer by tymma11 at 1:49 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • My ex-husband left me when I was seven months pregnant with our son, completely left the state. My son is now three and a half years old and has never met his "father". My ex has made no effort to see him, no real effort to be a part of his life, and doesn't even pay child support. While we were married, I was emotionally, mentally, and sexually abused by him. He is manipulative, lazy, and an unrepentant alcoholic. I have since met, and will marry, another man who my son calls daddy. Now, when he is old enough to figure out that his birthdate and our wedding date don't add up, he will have things explained to him as he is old enough to understand. When he is 18, he can meet his "father" if he chooses. Until then, it is my right and my job to protect him from the man, as far as I'm concerned. All my son is to him is a status symbol anyway and it has been his choice to stay away.
    ruthie11617

    Answer by ruthie11617 at 3:14 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • Ran out of space. :) All that to say that YOU need to do what YOU feel is best for YOUR child. Yes, it would be nice to have the father part of his/her life, but you need to decide if it will do more harm than good to have a father be a part of her life when the father wants you to get rid of the baby and the father's family is being the way they are about it. Personally, I think it would cause more harm to have him be a part of the baby's life.
    ruthie11617

    Answer by ruthie11617 at 3:17 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • Your child deserves to know who his father is. All that drama you're going thru with your baby daddy's family has ZERO to do with your baby's daddy and his relationship with his child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:34 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • He told me to abort the kid, he says he doesn't want it...
    vall11

    Comment by vall11 (original poster) at 1:39 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • I am just really scared for me and the baby, I don't want his parents to hate him I rather him tell his parents it was a lie..he really don't care for the baby, he was trying to make me get an abortion....he doesn't want nothing to do with it....and yes you are right I knew who my father was but I wished i never met him, my mother has been MOM AND DAD for me and all my brothers
    vall11

    Comment by vall11 (original poster) at 1:48 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • My daughter's Birthfather is not allowed to see my daughter I; think it all has to do with the well fare of the little one It has to deal with ;the situation and if the environment is safe for the kiid
    mamabeard3

    Answer by mamabeard3 at 1:58 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • If he doesn't want to be a part of the baby's life then I guess its his loss. As far as the family goes...they don't matter. What matters is you and your baby. If they continue threatening you, report it. They cannot get away with that. I want you to know that with the precautions you have already taken, you are being a great mama. You are already going the extra mile you need to keep your child safe and yourself.
    amber1330

    Answer by amber1330 at 2:20 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • I would not decide this yet. If he wants to see the baby and be a part of his/her life you might consider allowing that, because it will be good for your child to have a relationship with their father. If he truly does not want this baby and wants nothing to do with him/her then, there is nothing wrong with keeping child from him.
    Krysta622

    Answer by Krysta622 at 6:39 AM on Dec. 27, 2010

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