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Alright I have 3 boys...a 5yr.old, 4yr. old, and almost 2yr old...My 2 oldest boys, are driving me to my wits end...I need a new method of punishment or something...They are very stubborn...It doesn't matter how many times they are told not to do something or punished for doing it...They don't care...they are back doing it 10 min later!....I've tried everything, I've been told to try...taking toys form them,corner,time out, and nothing seems to work...They have no respect for me or anything in our home....I just do know what to do anymore...I'm just curious as to what other moms would do in my situation??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:55 AM on Dec. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (13)
  • Time to spank! It works and it is really sad that spanking has gotten such bad press. It's the surest way to establish and maintain authority in the home and respect for yourself as a bonus!

    Answer by NannyB. at 12:04 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • You have to find 1 way and stick with it and always be consistent. If you cannot control them at 5 & 4 how will you control them at 15 & 14??

    Google 1-2-3- magic.I have used this for well over 20 years ( I have a 23 y.o. boy and a 7 y.o. boy both with ADHD and 1 has autism)  
    Only give them a count to 3 and with each # tell them what the punishment will be. and follow thru. Don't make a threat you will not follow thru on. Try to make the punishment fit the crime so to speak and be firm.Make sure you take away something of value TO THEM!

    even if that means 1 child loses out and the other 2 do not

    Answer by justgrape723 at 12:04 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • No don't spank, that's not going to teach them anything except to hit. What exactly are they doing? Boys are aggressive by nature. They challenge and push the envelope. You can't punish them for being themselves. Try structuring their day, keep them busy with things you WANT them doing so they don't do things you don't want them to do. These are little boys. If they are doing things wrong then teach them how to do them right! Less punishment and more instruction.

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:23 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • We reward good behavior. If my kids do their chores, and behave reasonably, then they get a sticker on their chart. At the end of the week, they got to do something awesome. Some of our rewards are movies at the theatre, picking out family time activities, choosing what we get to eat. I know these sound ridiculous, but these things seem to make my kids happy. Give it a try.


    Answer by krissyvelazquez at 12:51 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • Why don't you try to focus on the good behavior? My 6yo has been having listening problems and I've been having to tell him things over and over. Now I am doing a "reward chart." One check for doing something the first time asked, no check and a warning the second time asked, and take a check away for third time asked. 10 checks and he gets a cotton ball. !0 cotton balls and we do something special together. This way he focuses on the goal and not just me getting mad all the time. Just remember to be consistent and persistent. Good luck.

    Answer by hotmama404 at 12:52 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • For the record i have tried the reward thing...for so many stickers for being good they get a didnt kids just don't care...they have no respect for anything....

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:16 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • Oh yea...and i do the 1-2 -3 thing all the worked for a little while, which is like most of the punishments with the boys...they only work for a lil while....I am consistent and I follow through every time I say I'm going to do something I do...I just don't get it...I am a single mom, so it's like the boys just don't think they have to listen to me......

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:22 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • Call Jojo. LOL!

    Answer by hotmama404 at 8:57 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • a swat does not teach to hit my parents spanked me and i have never went off and just hit someone even if i was mad, where do you people come up with that????

    Answer by mrssundin at 9:52 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

  • Try to find activities that can harness their curiosity and wear them out. My son's best days are when he is able to be active all day long. I have noticed I have more behavioral issues on days when we are trapped in the house. I agree that what ever discipline method you choose you and any other adults in their lives need to be consistent and stick with the punishment.

    Answer by amandajoy21 at 9:53 PM on Dec. 27, 2010

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