Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

How can I get my 3 year old to follow directions without always spanking?

My son is 3 and will be 4 at the end of January and very active. He always listens to his dad and rarely does dad have to spank him. I always have to repeat myself and give timeouts and spankings. I feel bad because I do not like spanking, however it seems to work for the moment. HELP!!!!!! I am at my wits end. I do not like looking like the mad woman.

Answer Question

Asked by hap2bmom at 5:56 PM on Dec. 28, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 7 (158 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Make sure he is looking at you and responds. Thats what I have to do with my son or he will ignore me.

    Answer by Misteh at 5:57 PM on Dec. 28, 2010

  • Well do you give the timeout AND a spanking? Don't give two punishments for one wrong. One method that has worked for us is the 1-2-3 method. Where you simply say "That's 1" if it continues "That's 2" and if it still continues "That's 3, take 5" and put them in the time out area, whether it's their room or stairs for each minute of their age. Don't say anything with don't know what you are talking about and don't really listen to it, you waste your breath....but eventually they catch on and will stop at 1 or 2!

    Answer by Mom2Jack04 at 6:03 PM on Dec. 28, 2010

  • Whatever the dad does, try to mimick. Seems like dad has more control and you could take some notes. I only say that because my son always listens to his dad, I haven't spanked, but mimicking what daddy does has helped me regain some respect/control.

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 6:05 PM on Dec. 28, 2010

  • Is there something he really likes to do?
    I tell my daughter if she gets in to too much trouble she won't be allowed to watch cartoons at all the next day.

    Answer by genagina at 6:14 PM on Dec. 28, 2010

  • I would show him what he needs to do before expecting him to follow through on something. He is only three years old and part of following instructions is knowing what is expected from him.

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 6:38 PM on Dec. 28, 2010

    put the kid in time out and if he/she gets out put them back in it till the learn to listen....i havent had to spank my son in a very long time!! he is 4 years old and i give him time outs instead of spanking.....i dont spank him because his father used to beat his butt really i refuse to spank him..........he hates time outs but trust me,they would rather do time outs instead of getting spanked!!!!

    Answer by SMALLfry05 at 2:02 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.