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How can i get my BF to quit drinking so much???

He drinks all the time.... for all i know he's drinking at work. He asks like an ass when he does and i don't like it around our 10 month old!! Please Help!!!

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MindWarped420

Asked by MindWarped420 at 8:04 PM on Jul. 6, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (14)
  • Honey,there is nothing you can do...You don't have any control over another person's behavior. Contact Alanon in your area and start going to meetings.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:12 PM on Jul. 6, 2008

  • You cannot do anything. He has the problem and he needs to fix it. He will do this if and when he wants to. Trust me, I know about addicts. We love them, we want to change them , We try to control them and all that happens is we end up going crazy...because they still do what they want. Check out a book called "The language of letting go"...it is soo helpful in helping you, the loved one of an addict. The only thing that you can do is take care of yourself and your little one. If he is dangerous...you need to leave. I know that this is probably the last words of advice that you wish to hear....but it is from years of experience and bought and paid for years of counseling. I hope that you can set boundaries for him to keep yourself and your baby safe..and give him consequences. Like ..If you come home drunk , We are leaving.  if he does...then you need to do what you said you would.  Those 2 things are crucial. take care of yourself.
    MommasCooCoo

    Answer by MommasCooCoo at 8:17 PM on Jul. 6, 2008

  • I am having the same problem with my husband. Ever since I meet him he drinks. He says I know where the door is and if I don't like then leave. I hate being around him when he drinks. I guess I stick around because I don't have to work and he makes good money. Which is stupid but I live 1000 miles away from family. He's not abusive or anything he's just a drunk.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:57 PM on Jul. 6, 2008

  • Join Alanon, best thing I ever did
    Joy32158

    Answer by Joy32158 at 10:00 PM on Jul. 6, 2008

  • You have to realize his addiction isnt yours and seperate your child from it being you can be raising a future addict, the personality traits can be copied. Your baby is your first priority not your man. Make decisions for you and your child because you will be the last ones standing
    tainabxpr22

    Answer by tainabxpr22 at 10:10 PM on Jul. 6, 2008

  • You can't!
    rosetoes

    Answer by rosetoes at 12:05 AM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • First things first, get the 10 month old away from him. Tell him that he can't see the baby if he's been drinking. Document what you can in case you need some proof. If you live with him- it's time for a change. You have to show him that you are serious. He will either decide on his own that it's time to get help or he'll continue his ways but at least the baby will be safe. Good luck
    ChattyWifePlus2

    Answer by ChattyWifePlus2 at 12:26 AM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • First things first, get the 10 month old away from him. Tell him that he can't see the baby if he's been drinking. Document what you can in case you need some proof. If you live with him- it's time for a change. You have to show him that you are serious. He will either decide on his own that it's time to get help or he'll continue his ways but at least the baby will be safe. Good luck
    ChattyWifePlus2

    Answer by ChattyWifePlus2 at 12:26 AM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • Leave him. If he isn't willing to give up drinking to be a good father for his child, then he's just a waste of space. I'm sure deep down, he's a great guy, but you don't need someone like that in your lives. If he sobers up & can prove that he's serious about being a family, then you can reconsider. I know what I'm saying isn't easy, but it's probably for the best.
    crazysocks830

    Answer by crazysocks830 at 1:58 AM on Jul. 7, 2008

  • people have to want to change first... you can be there to be supportive but it isnt going to be effective unless he really wants the help. And the first thing you should do is get your child away from him. It is bad enough that he is putting himself in a bad situation but it isnt fair to your child. Goodluck i wish you the best.
    lilmomma0408

    Answer by lilmomma0408 at 4:59 AM on Jul. 7, 2008

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