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Not sure what I should really do or how to even talk to him.

Ok My SO and I have been together for a lil over a year now, well our relationship has hit the bottom and I am not sure if I should stay or go, we have a 3 months old son together and I dont want him to be the only reason we stay together because if there is no love then why stay, I asked him the other day if he even loves me and he said generally yes he does WTF does that mean. I also asked him if he ever just feels hopeless about our relaionship and he said he gave up on feeling that way because obviously we are together. CONT> ----->

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:56 PM on Nov. 10, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • I told him that maybe we should just leave and he said no that he doesn't want us to go when I ask why its always, because your moms house isn't a good place for you guys their all crazy....Whatever, I just dont understand if he loves me then why doesn't he just tell me thats why he wants us to stay, he also deleted me off of his myspace which is childish to be mad over I know, but I think he also changed it to say he is single now which again I dont understand.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:59 PM on Nov. 10, 2008

  • I don't get the myspace thing. That's kind of weird.

    However, my DH and I went through something similar when I was pregnant and for the first few months of my DD life. We even broke up when I was about 8 months pregnant. (No he is not awful, it was our rock bottom and we agreed. We broke up for about 8 hours. lol). For a long time I wasn't sure if I loved him anymore and I think he felt the same way. Having a new baby is hard on everyone involved! It really takes a toll on a relationship.

    jcsscfam5

    Answer by jcsscfam5 at 4:12 PM on Nov. 10, 2008

  • Start taking time for the two of you. It is just as important as your finances, the well being of your baby, your health, etc. Do the things that you used to do when you first fell in love. All the simple little things we forget to do when things are comfortable. Talk to him about doing the same. It will take work from both of you.

    But if he doesn't work, don't be afraid to start over. People always say that it is better for the baby to have parents who stay together. But I think it is more important to have two happy, fulfilled, parents. Do what feels best.
    jcsscfam5

    Answer by jcsscfam5 at 4:13 PM on Nov. 10, 2008

  • i think you have received fantastic advice from pp. i have nothing more to say.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 5:49 PM on Nov. 10, 2008

  • It sounds like you guys still love each other, and that's important. When did this all start falling apart? I know my relationship changed when our son was born (we honestly never fought beforehand, and now we get annoyed fairly often, though I think it's mostly the lack of sleep), as it should. Becoming a parent adds a lot of new stresses to life, even though it also brings so much joy.

    I would look into some counseling before you call it quits. If you can't afford to see someone, look into a church or other social services available in your area. We can only tell you so much, knowing only one side, but I don't think it sounds like you guys are out of options yet!
    KatieCrandall

    Answer by KatieCrandall at 6:08 PM on Nov. 10, 2008

  • My space is for teens. It sounds very much that he loves you or cares for you a lot. Talk to someone together. Don't let him go. Good Luck.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:46 PM on Nov. 10, 2008

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