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2 Bumps

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well me and my boyfriend have been together for 4 yrs and now i just am not interestd in sex,it's nothing about him,he is good looking and i have no complaint about him in the bedroom bed all i wanna do at night is go to beddddddddddddddddddddddd.He wants sex about every other day and it's creating a problem and we r starting to argue about this.I keep tryn to explain to him that kids,household chors,appointments,taking care of animals.stress,money have alot to do with the way that i am now but he don;t get it.HELP i'm going nuts.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:42 PM on Dec. 29, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • when you're in a rut like that where it's actually creating problems you need to SCHEDULE it. just like you plan to go to the grocery store, make an appointment for the kids shots, etc. Just for awhile, to get it feeling normal and routine again.
    hibbingmom

    Answer by hibbingmom at 2:45 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • This seems to be a common problem because I keep seeing it lately. Have you talked to him and tried to come up with a compromise? Maybe he feels rejected? I know it would hurt me if my SO was always turning me down.
    MeandMyBabes

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 2:46 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • Tell him you're not in the mood and that's why he has hands.
    tommy_mommy

    Answer by tommy_mommy at 2:46 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • If my SO said that to me (about the hands) I wouldn't like that at all. We all get tired and have days we are just not into it, and shouldn't feel obligated to have sex, but if he's getting rejected all the time, it probably hurts his pride.
    MeandMyBabes

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 2:48 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • Does he participate in the things you have listed. If he help out you might have some more energy for him. The littlest thing a guy does for a lady means the world to her. Explain to him you "need" help because then tell him how you feel.
    Take vitamins, drink lots of water, exercise, and watch what you eat.
    Good Luck
    bmwlover

    Answer by bmwlover at 2:49 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • Try something different, get a babysitter for the whole day! Go out to the spa while he is at work for the day. Get all dressed up and go out to dinner and enjoy yourself. If finances won't allow that, then take the kids to grandma, go to a hotel room and just sit and read, then pack a picnic to have in your room. Get creative and don't deny him too often, thats why men look elsewhere. Good luck!
    parajumper3

    Answer by parajumper3 at 2:52 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • Your not going nuts. There are times I don't feel like it either. Heck I can go a whole month. What I try to do is get myself in the mood. Whether it is just thinking about it or find whatever floats your boat. Start with that. And if you feel like you are doing everything around the home, ask him to help.
    Lilipineapple

    Answer by Lilipineapple at 2:55 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • I have tlkd to him and tried to get him to help out a little and he'll do it that day but i'm not in the mood that same night he get;s all pissd off and wont do shit for a wile.He has a habit of makeing me feel like i have to give him sex whn he wants it reuardless if i dnt and i feel like sex is betta whn both parties want it.I could care less about sex i have to much on my brain these day's.IS it wrong of him to get so pissd at me?it's not like he dnt get it he just dnt get it the way and whn he wants so in a way i feel like to bad nigga,i am very head strong and if i say no and u keep buggin me then u really not gnna get any ass.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:58 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • Sounds to me like you're both stubborn and neither of you can see how the other person is feeling. Or, if you can, you don't care. I'd probably be pissed if I were him too. If you said you won't have sex because you need help, he helps, and you still don't have sex with him, yeah, I can see why he'd be pissed.

    I don't think he should be mad about you not wanting it all the time, but what you consider a lot of sex, he may not. Hence the need to compromise. Like I said, he probably feels rejected. You feel used, he feels rejected, and you're both playing a game of chicken on who will hold out the longest.
    MeandMyBabes

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 3:05 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • He needs to be more supportive at this point and not mad. Women's physiology is very different from that of men. He needs to understand that.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 3:36 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

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