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nephew as my son....

I live at my parents house with my 2 kids because i am going to school and I am going through a divorce... my parents are raising my brothers son because he is a piece of shit and wont do it himself so they got custody of him.. he is 5 years old.. my son is 2 and my daughter is 1.. When I moved in with them my kids listened never pitched a fit and honestly, with a few faults, were the perfect kids.. they never back talked.. never told me no.. and did exactly what I said when i said it.. i never had to start counting to 3 until a couple months after we moved in.. my nephew on the other hand throws fits. throws things when he gets mad.. pokes out his lips and screams and yells refuses to do what he is told and back talks among other things like taking toys away from my younger kids hitting them biting them and just plain being mean.. i am trying to straighten him up because like i told my parents they are raising him as a grandbaby not their child and he needs a mother figure to be strong and firm so i have taken on that responcibility.. i just need some advice as of what to do because spanking him is just not working.. i have tried taking away toys.. etc.. help please... o and fyi: his mother did drugs the whole time she was pregnant he has ADHD and i believe that is a big part of it
Thanks any ideas would be helpful!!

 
momof241988

Asked by momof241988 at 4:49 PM on Dec. 29, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 13 (1,285 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • Kids will react to any type of attention they can get. Both Positive and Negative. Sometimes, my son who is 6 will have a week where he is bad at school and doesn't sit down or pick up after himself. It's hard beacause I am always telling him to stop, sit down ,time out, etc. I have to step back and find something to praise him for. Even if it's for something so small as to flushing the toliet, putting the seat down, washing his hands. Things he does on a daily basis. Try rewarding his good behavior more than picking out the negative. If he is harming the children, or just being mean that behavior needs to be addressed also. But don't let the simple things go un noticed as well.
    DancerMomof2

    Answer by DancerMomof2 at 12:08 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • I am raising grandchildren too. My granddaughter is fetal alcohol effected. I can only speak for what I've seen from her. She is very needy. Lotas of attention, lots of hugs, lots of reassurance. If she doesn't get the positive she will settled for negative attention. She is very, very angry at her bio parents. (She is 7 been with us almost 6 yrs now). She struggles with feelings of low self esteen and abandonment.. She doesn't have ADHD, but her broth does, as does their bio father(our son). Lots of patience, lots of structure "the same time, some thing every day" kind of structure. Simple instructions and lots of praise for good choices.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 4:57 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • There is an aspergers, autism ADHD group here on CM. I think the best if you ask your question there because they are in your shoes and they raise children with ADHD. IT is a really good group and the people are nice as well. http://www.cafemom.com/group/76 You can get loads of help and advice from those super mums:)

    adriennfaklya

    Answer by adriennfaklya at 5:20 PM on Dec. 29, 2010

  • If he really does seem to have some issues, I would get him evaluated to see if he has some bahvioral/emotional problems he may need help with. Otherwise keep doign what you are doing and be consistent and firm with him. give him rules and boundaries and rewards to work for.
    KTMOM

    Answer by KTMOM at 5:46 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • o and when i tell him to do something he says "For what reason" it was cute the 1st time but now im fed up
    momof241988

    Comment by momof241988 (original poster) at 4:55 PM on Dec. 29, 2010