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2 Bumps

Am I completely over my ex or do I like need to see someone for this?

Okay I have been divorced from my ex for 5 and half years now. We were grade school sweethearts dated from when i was like 11 years old til our divorce which was when i was almost 20. We had a child together when i was 18 got married when i was 18. He went into the army and was in iraq he came home a completely diffrent person and wanted me out of his life like what we had never happend basically. So i ended up moving out and lived on my own for awhile he had moved some girl in that he had met when he was deployed. So i eventually moved on like 9 months later it was hard but i did it. He got engaged but it eventually didnt work out. I ended up preggo from the guy that i was with and still am with 5 years later. But this relationship has been a roller coaster from hell. He does drugs and drinks a lot. I love my ex but i also love my new guy. But my boyfriend has done so much emotional damage to me like verbal abuse and in the begginning he put his hands on me. My ex got married a year and half ago to this lady and i just found out on xmas day that they were getting a divorce since it didnt work out. once in awhile we will talk about what had happend but we dont talk about it all. Is this what is wrong that i never got closer on my marriage? Am i still fully in love with my ex husband? Should i leave my boyfriend? I am happy with my boyfriend to a point then i am not i dream about my ex and what we could have and etc. It is hard since we have a child together and plus when we got married it was dec 27 so the holidays are harder. My ex treated me like a queen and he still gives me xmas presents and hugs me help i just dont if i am still in love with him or if i need some professionall help..............

Answer Question

Asked by anz2008 at 1:35 AM on Dec. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 3 (26 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • im not sure dear. sounds kinda confusing but if your still in love do what you gotta do to make you happy :) but i wouldnt go back to him unless you are sure he is serious and you feel it will workout 100% u know :) well good luck sorry i dont have much to say hope it all works out good

    Answer by Luckyme3487 at 1:57 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • The more i think about the situation the more i get confused my self. I think that i am in love with the person he was before he went to iraq and i want that person back soooooo bad but i know i will never have that and i think i am holding on to that. What i have now will never compare to what i had with my ex husband. Think things just happend so fast with me and my ex when our divorce happend that nethier of us will completely understand nor love someone again like we loved each other. I love my boyfriend but i am not completely in love with him. My ex still has my heart and i dont think i will ever get it back.

    Comment by anz2008 (original poster) at 2:02 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • You definitely need professional help. First you need to build up your self-esteem and get out of this relationship since he does drugs and hits you not only for yourself but for your children. Work on getting yourself and your life together before becoming involved with any man and do it with a professional. Good luck to you!

    Answer by rosiemendo at 7:55 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • professional help

    you are placing all your self into another person- a man
    and the two that you speak of treat you poorly
    the first one, you are in love with the idea of him, you are loviing like the child your were when you were together, he changed you know that, he is that that boy anymore
    the 2nd hits you and does drugs - nothing more needs saying about that! - you are in love with the idea of love and not either of these men, love yourself, seek help, get yourself together, after you are healthy then maybe a man, but not now, not these two and not another that crosses your path, you are not in a helathy place for any relationship
    sorry, hugs and good health to you

    Answer by fiatpax at 8:35 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. i am sorry but these things are too long.....
    1. get away from the abusive husband
    2. get yourself and kids in a STABLE situation where they can be safe and comfortable
    3. find yourself and find out what you really want out of life
    its okay to not be in a relationship for awhile..get yourself and kids together first ....good luck

    Answer by sunflower39346 at 8:42 AM on Dec. 30, 2010

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