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3 Bumps

My husband has gotten very snappy lately

It the first anniversary of his mother's death. I know that its effecting him. I just don't know how to help. We are together mostly 24/7. We enjoy each others company and have a lot of fun. But since the death of my sister and two weeks later a close friend of 16yrs died, then the Annv. of his Mom... I think it took a toll on both of us. I can't think right now as to how I can help him, encourage him... its just not like him to be so defensive? in lovePlz help give me something I can do to help him while he's hurting....

Answer Question
 
WalknWithGod

Asked by WalknWithGod at 10:31 PM on Dec. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (5,044 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I don't know, I'm going to bump you. I go through the same thing with my hubby, and wish I knew what to do.
    tntmom1027

    Answer by tntmom1027 at 10:33 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • He needs space. It is a good idea to just give him a hug and say you are their for him when he needs you.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 10:34 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • good luck i am sorry that you guys are going thorough such a though time.
    ChanQ

    Answer by ChanQ at 10:36 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • HAVE SEX ....i know weird not the time for it but if you have heard as much as i have thats the way men show thier love and for them they think thats the way we show love also so maybe it will just make things a little less tense for him maybe it will work
    katally77

    Answer by katally77 at 10:52 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • HA ha ha katally77... I was just going to post that too. My husband gets more sex when he is unhappy. And it helps him feel better. Men are sexual beings and sex is great therapy for men.
    SleepingBeautee

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 10:53 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • let him know you love him and you'll be there for him tell him if its space he needs you understand and will give it to him! If he wants to just talk about memories of his mom tell him you'll be there to listen to them! if he wants to have sex then have sex! good luck and hope things get better for you two
    mom2eas

    Answer by mom2eas at 11:09 PM on Dec. 30, 2010

  • He's probably depressed, and so are you. I can definitely understand why. Just tell him that you love him and remind him that you are there for him when he wants to talk.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:02 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • What would you want him to do if the situation was reversed? It sounds like he needs his space; let him have it. Let him know that you will be there when he needs you to be. Treat him to some nice things to lift his spirits.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:39 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Is he getting enough physical exercise? In a situation like this a little more can help. Get him on the eliptical trainer. Buy him a punching ball. Sweat it out. Push your face in a pillow and scream. Crack all the leftover walnuts from christmas. .... Just a few suggestions.
    BeachMom81

    Answer by BeachMom81 at 7:02 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • So sorry to hear for all your losses. Has your husband sort grief and loss counselling, after all you have lost significant people in your life. There are numerous stages to grief and loss and one of them is anger, we all grieve at different stages. This must be hard on you to guess you could offer support surrounding grief and loss. But being a male he may not be willing to do this. Is he sleeping ok, what about his apetite do you think he may be feeling depressed. Maybe trying to do somethig together that you both enjoy! Hope this helps.
    Lisas232

    Answer by Lisas232 at 7:22 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

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