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My mom wants me to give my daughter a Russian name (I'm from Russia) but...

I live in Kansas City, my entire family still lives in Russia. I haven't seen any of them in 5 years and I miss them a lot. My mom was always like my best friend and I tell her everything and almost always take her advice.

I'm expecting and my mom may never meet her grand child...of course she plans to visit but she has health issues and may not be able to and I'm not sure that finances will allow for a trip to Russia for me and the baby once he/she comes.

My dilemma is that my mom wants the baby to have a traditional Russian name...but I don't want to! I actually really don't like our names much at all and my baby will be born and raised in the USA and will be lucky if he/she ever even visits Russia.

I don't want to hurt my mom, it's bad enough that she won't see the baby much if at all. But I really really really don't want to give my baby a Russian name!

What would you do?


Asked by menko21 at 12:36 AM on Dec. 31, 2010 in Baby Names

Level 8 (265 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (18)
  • I understand how your mom feels, but I will say that my boys are adults, as there mother I got to choose their names, and it's up to my sons and their wives to choose their children's names....

    So, your mom, however good her intentions are, needs to respect your right to choose names you love for your children. How does your husband feel about the names for your baby?

    Good luck, hopefully your mom will understand.

    Answer by ohwrite at 12:41 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • maybe an "american" first name and a Russian middle name...

    Answer by 2lilbumblebees at 12:38 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I am from Deutschland, and can some what comprehend your position. However, at some point I do have strong roots to home, no matter if I am in the USA right now. My DD does not have a German name. But as a middle name. . . I think that is honoring home and heritage and honoring your own heart. I hope that makes sense to you.

    Answer by Kirs at 12:46 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • ** also you family in russia can call her by her middle name...if you want you could even tell them it is the opposite ( tell them her middle name is her first)

    Answer by 2lilbumblebees at 12:39 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I have always loved the name Tatyana.(sp?) Is there a Russian name that might have an American sounding nickname for that Russian name?


    Answer by JeremysMom at 12:39 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • i would do what you want..its YOUR child..i was also gonna suggest an american first name, and russian middle name..but, in the end..its your get to name your lil bundle of joy whatever YOU want to!!

    Answer by alexis_06 at 12:42 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Woops, "as their mom"

    Answer by ohwrite at 12:42 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I like the idea of a name you like for the 1st name and perhaps a Russian name for the middle one. But go with what you are happy with. Your daughter will be alive a long time after your parents are gone.

    Answer by MumaSue at 12:43 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I think you should do what makes YOU happy. Your mom will love your child regardless of its name. (My dad made fun of my son's name until I asserted myself and told him that it wasn't his decision - he was being mean about it) I think your favorite name for the first name and maybe your mom's name or anther family member's name for the middle name would be nice. I can understand her wanting a traditional name to carry on something she may feel you have "lost" but she also has to understand that this is your decision and a name isn't what defines someone or links them to their heritage.

    Answer by TitusMom7 at 12:48 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Do you have specific naming traditions in your family? I'm curious, because my SIL is Russian and her siblings and her all share a variation of their father's name as their middle name. She said it's a Russian tradition. Her name is Yelena, but she goes by Elena. Her father's name is Nikolai, so they all have that name in some form (Nicole for her I believe). She comes from a family of 14 brothers and sisters, imagine trying to think of different ways for that name, LOL. She didn't choose to continue the tradition with her son however.

    Anyway, to answer your question, I think you should name your child whatever you choose. Your mom can beg you all she wants, but ultimately it's your decision (and your SO's).

    Answer by thatgirl70 at 12:52 AM on Dec. 31, 2010