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2 Bumps

BM's First Attempt To Get Rid Of SM

First of all before BM I had no enemies (that i knew of). In the beginnig we were descent to one another. I invited her into my home two or three times...I had no beef with her and it was very important to me that we all got alone.
I watched BM go through 2 of her 4 relationships...back to back like she needed a man. BM has 3 kids.
1st relationship the guy didn't know she was Married. Dh found out when she told him she was pregnant (He was Fixed and knew this was impossible) and they got a divorce....divorce papers indicated she was pregnant. she got an abortion after. Cheated on next guy and dated a 2nd guy. He was a drug attic and stole lots of things....The kids were confused different men, different home every year....mmmmm.
3rd guy - we hoped he was the one. He actually talked to us- nice guy. That didn't work. Month later guy #4 she got to marry her after 6months in.
During the 3rd the drama began! I think she was jealous of our relationship. til this day she hates me. that would be fine with me, but she has threatened and is using the kids to hurt both SM & BD.

 
1happyeverafter

Asked by 1happyeverafter at 10:11 AM on Dec. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Level 6 (143 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • My ex husband has gone through more women then I cant count and as a BM I can only give it to you from my perspective. Dont get involved. She is obviously not the same as you are and you arent ever going to see things eye to eye. It doesnt matter how many boyfriends she has, or husbands, or kids. Its her life. The only thing that matters are the kids. If she is interfering with custody file a motion for contempt with the courts and keep everything very business like. I would tell DH he chose her before he chose you and if the shoe was on the other foot you would not ask him to try and be friends with your ex if it just wasnt working for him. I have gotten with my ex to where I am just not interested in his drama anymore. He finally did remarry but I think mostly bc this wife was Christian and insisted they did. I dont see it lasting long. Just keep arms length and make sure she follows whatever court order there is.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 10:16 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I am also a mother, whatever you can say about her, your husband loved her and because of that, he has 3 children with her. She is not perfect, neither are you but it is not he job to live her life to please you. As long as she is not harming the children and she is obeying her custody order, stay out of her personal life.
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 1:33 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • It doesn't really sound like she is trying to get rid of you
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:16 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • It doesn't sound like she wants to get rid of you. Have you talked to your husband about it?
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 3:31 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Yes She told my husband she was going to get rid me. She has drug my step kids from pillar to pole and I am not and was never in her business either. I gave birth to a child also and sheloves her stepsiblings just as much as i do and have seen them hurting because of their mom.
    With shared custody the only time BM had them was the nights(after 6) and the weekend in which she would go out to the club etc...leaving the kids home. Because she moved in with a man so far away on her weeks they didn't get home til 7 or 730 on a school night. To help her out (Staying out of her business) My husband also kept the kids on her week because she wouldn't make it on time to pick them up from daycare on her week.I was home everyday at 3 so they were with me (picking them up from school -dinner- homework etc...) until she picked them up at 6pm(some. Dad worked til at least 7 to 8pm.This was her week so he would work more.
    1happyeverafter

    Comment by 1happyeverafter (original poster) at 12:29 PM on Jan. 3, 2011

  • There was way more to the story then what i could put in the above box.
    But i know having several men within a years time is not healthy for a child and they have been affected by all them.
    Everyone have skeletons in the closet and do't think im perfect.
    My concern are the kids and suprisingly they have confided alot in me. They have been with me more than they have BM.
    I can care less if she likes me but unlike her i would do anything to protect these kids.
    1happyeverafter

    Comment by 1happyeverafter (original poster) at 12:40 PM on Jan. 3, 2011

  • PS..Her last threat to get rid of me has recently landed us in court in which they granted her temperary custody.
    The kids cry everytime they leave.

    I believe she is just jealous of what she lost and because of her adultry she has never forgiven herself and carries this anger with her.She had a great life with my Husband and not able to get that back or find the same type of man like him.
    I truly feel sorry for her!

    1happyeverafter

    Comment by 1happyeverafter (original poster) at 12:54 PM on Jan. 3, 2011

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