Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how would you play her game?

so my mil is pissed off at me for changing the babysitting plans tonight, instead of her watching my 4 year old she's going to watch my 11 month old. those of you who read my post yesterday know why i changed the plans. she's upset both because i changed the plans and because i told her the true reason why. my 3 year old niece is in town and sil and her are staying with mil, so if my 4 year old stays there she'd be with my niece too. my sil and mil treat my daughter unfairly, let the 3 year old act like a brat and tell my 4 year old that since she's older she can handle it herself. im not going to let my daughter feel insignifcant and be treated unfairly, so therefore her and my 2 year old will be staying with my mom. my mil favors our baby out of our kids so i know she'll give her the attention she would not give my 4 year old.

anyway, she wouldn't talk to me on the phone (not answering my calls) so this conversation happened thru text. and she did not answer me once i told her my daughter didn't want to stay with her cause my niece doesn't share and nobody does anything about it. this morning, i text her to ask her if she has all the things she needs for the baby (she usually has extra stuff on hand) and she didn't answer. i gave her a few minutes and sent her another text, asking her if she would rather watch my niece and daughter her at my house (she lives 5 minutes away) if it would be easier since i have carpet and she has all tile, and everything the baby needs is here. no answer as of yet, sent this text an hour ago.

i know she's still expecting me to eventually bring the baby over tonight. (husband and i are going to a wedding reception). but i feel if she's going to be an immature child and not answer me, i'm certainly not going to bring my baby over there. she's done this before, one time i asked her to babysit another one of my kids and she didn't answer, and when i saw her later that night she asked "where's so and so?" umm hello? you didn't answer me!

so i can either take the baby over and play into her immature game, or play my own and just stay home with the kids. im not going to ask hubby to stay home cause this is the reception of his best friend. i dont care if i go or not, id rather be with hubby tonight but not if i have to jump thru hoops and kiss mil's ass. im perfectly fine staying home and doing sparklers with the kids and watching the ball drop later.

what would you do?


Asked by tnm786 at 10:17 AM on Dec. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Level 43 (159,608 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Stay home with the kiddos.

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 10:22 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • You forgot a third option... find another sitter! Grandma has LOST sitting privileges, effective now. Yeah, it's short notice but I wouldn't trust her for one second now.

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:23 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • If I could find another sitter that's what I would do and I would not play intot the games that she is playing.

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 10:28 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Yep. And it would throw cold water all over her attempt to ruin your night.

    Answer by gdiamante at 10:32 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I dont play games so I just wouldnt play. When I ask my in laws for a favor, like to babysit for me, I dont usually tell them how it is going to happen per say. I take them up on their offer or I dont. I dont split my kids up when they get babysat either. Your 4 yr old really is too young to blame on not wanting to come over, and it is very hurtful to you to do this the way you did. I think maybe you should have went and told her exactly why you were doing what you were in person. I would have also said unless things were more equal among the 3 and 4 yr old you would just find another sitter for both kids until they left. I do understand unruly kids, and how some grandparents seem to favor them and who knows why. I just wouldnt use the kids to say oh they dont want to come over when in reality they arent old enough to understand. Take both kids to the same sitter and work this stuff out with her later.

    Answer by gemgem at 10:34 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I'd text her and tell her if I didn't hear from her by (give a time) I'll assume she's not sitting and I'll find another sitter

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:43 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I don't play games. If they are going to act like that, I would find another sitter or stay home. Next time, she takes both kids with no others being there or I find a different sitter again.
    That is, If I let her watch them.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 10:48 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • just find a new sitter and have a nice night with your hubby......let mil stew in her owe game for a while....but next time i think you need to hire a babysitter for all 3kids with out tthe drama of splitting them up.....

    Answer by cara124 at 11:20 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Since she hasn't answered you, I would take that as my answer and make other arrangements. For me, that would be the end of the matter. I do not play games with anyone!

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:36 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • thats true gdiamante. my mom is still offering to take my 4 and 2 year olds. she just doesn't have it in her to watch all three :) but my closest friend could possibly take my 4 year old (i babysat her 4 year old last night, we exchange kids quite often!) and my mom can take the younger two. i could possibly do that! :)

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 10:24 AM on Dec. 31, 2010

Next question in Relationships
Have you ever faked it

Next question overall (Money & Work)
what would you do?