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8 Bumps

My brother-in-law committed suicide!

Hi, my sister's husband of 15 years committed suicide. My sister is currently living with my family. Most days she seems fine but I know she is having a hard time. I did not know her husband well, so I can not go down "memory lane" with her. Anyone else ever delt with this? How do I help her deal with this? Any suggestions on books, groups?

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Asked by happycboys at 8:16 PM on Dec. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Level 8 (264 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Could you suggest counseling to her? It may help her to talk w/ a stranger that she can say anything she wants to. Just be there for when she does want to talk to you. Good luck.

    Answer by genagina at 8:19 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • the only thing i can say is if she wants to talk let her and if she doesnt just be there for her. there are great groups on here. also see about a mental health consouling service in ur town usually its little to no cost and u can do payments. if they have kids it might help for them too

    Answer by knagsmom at 8:21 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • She may need to find a therapist. If she has any feelings of guilt, she'll need help getting through them.

    Also a local support group might help too.


    Answer by twinsplus2more at 8:24 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • That's awful! I just cant understand how someone could do that. Cant they see that things will eventually get better? Dont they think about the ones they leave behind? Anyway, like some of the other posters said, they have support groups/counseling in your area. I hope she will go. In the meantime, being there for her is a comfort she needs right now.

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 8:29 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Let her get where she needs to get, and be there for her all the time.

    Answer by PA-PAGrandma at 9:03 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Just be there for her when she is ready to talk. Until them just give her space, she is probably still trying to make sence of all of it! Good Luck!

    Answer by momma2b2008 at 10:06 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Counseling is a good place to start.

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:19 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • OMG! I'm so sorry for your loss, but just be there for her. Make sure she's okay, and try to spend as much time with her as you possibly can. This is killing her inside, so she really need you guys right now. Best of luck to you all.

    Answer by ambr2006 at 4:28 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • When my son and I found my DH's uncle hanging in his barn, it was the worst night ever! The aftermath for myself, my son, and my husband had to be handled. It took my son a short while before he would go up the stairs at our home just to go to bed as we had to go up stair where we found the uncle. To this day, though, he will not go into the barn. I did ok during the day, but the nights were the hardest for me. I finally had to go to a counselor to help me deal with the images that I could not handle. My husband took the longest to handle the death. He took it the hardest and when he finally allowed the grieving process to happen, it opened up the flood gates. He was bitter, mad, hurt, and sad. He could not understand why. All we can do is be there for those that need us and allow them to grieve at their own pace. Counseling is a great help as is a loving family.

    Answer by guyandtoni01 at 5:26 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • thats so sad, I hope ur sister will get through this. I live in an area where suicide in men is very high, its so hard to watch people u love try to get past it..

    Answer by DawnLauren at 4:23 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

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