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4 Bumps

What would you do and/or how would you feel?

My husband and I cleaned the house this morning and all of a sudden *he* decides he's going to build a toy box for the kids (nice...ok).
SO....he spends the REST OF THE DAY in the detatched garage making this "toy box"...which he still hasn't finished while I watched our 4 kids under 4, one with a fever...so he's not feeling good and now I'm here at home and he went off to his parents house (5 min drive away) to take back a drill he borrowed. That was OVER an hour ago.
Would you be kinda upset? It seems like if I mention to him that I need help, and "keep" him from doing what HE decides to do, he gets discouraged about it and mopes around.
Is it my only choice to just sit here, suck it up and let HIM DO WHAT HE WANTS TO DO?
Btw....this isn't just a random thing....he does this freequently, where HE decides he's going to do something...usually on his own and I feel as though I'm just stuck with his decision.
How would you feel? I'm resentful and feel like I'm just here for the ride, rather than driving my own life!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:03 PM on Dec. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • (((HUGS))) HAPPY NEW YEAR MOMMA! Tell him what you just told us and figure out what you need from him .
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 9:08 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • It sounds like your husband is a little spoiled.
    PA-PAGrandma

    Answer by PA-PAGrandma at 9:10 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • We were supposed to be watching a marathon of Ghost Adventures tonight....but I guess we won't now :(
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:11 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • I know how you feel about feelig like you're not driving your own life. I'm still trying to figure out how to handle this. GL :)
    Averylee85

    Answer by Averylee85 at 9:11 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Have you tried telling him all this? Guys are absolutely clueless sometimes. If he has never been told he has to or that he needs to accommodate you, he won't realize you want or need it. My SO did this same thing to me for two years. He would just play video games, sleep in all weekend, never get up in the middle of the night with our son...NOTHING...and I worked full time too. He just didn't realize/care what he was putting me through by being so selfish. It caused a HUGE gap between us that he is still trying to work at fixing. You need to try to get this fixed now before you become so resentful that all you want to do is leave. I wish you luck...if you need someone to talk to, you can message me any time.
    TitusMom7

    Answer by TitusMom7 at 2:09 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • I'd be mildly upset. We watched the marathon, too. There were three or so episodes we hadn't seen yet. Call him and get his ass back over to the house to help with the kids.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:12 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • I get annoyed when hubby does stuff like that, but I usually (unless its majoy) tell myself to not sweat the small stuff because its not worth fighting over it.
    aubrianasangel

    Answer by aubrianasangel at 2:31 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • I agree with TitusMom7 about talking to him about it. I had a similar problem with my husband when it came to our kids. It seemed like anytime they had projects for school, needed something, or were sick Mom was the only one available. I finally had to tell my husband that I was also working full time, I also needed to get some sleep, and I was not the only parent. After a few of these conversations, he finally got the clue. I was still the only one to clean up the vomit as he was just join in. He could not handle the smell. Wuss......
    guyandtoni01

    Answer by guyandtoni01 at 5:44 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • yea i would be upset too. you just have to talk to him and tell him how you feel, my BF does the same thing sometimes i ask him to do something and he does the complete opposite..
    kyiahsmommy

    Answer by kyiahsmommy at 11:43 PM on Jan. 2, 2011

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