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2 Bumps

I am feeling so discourage about my life and marriage right now!

Please trust me, I am not being ungrateful. Especially when there are so many families going through worst things than I am but right now I am just feeling too overwhelmed.

Yes I have a nice big home which I am the only one to take care of inside and out, I'm so tire of doing everything myself, no help from him at all. I never asked to have this big home. I would be happy living in a shack as long as I had my family with me.

He has a good job that pays for the mortgage and the bills. That is great but we hardly ever see him. So I'm left here alone in this big home with my dd and no money because remember his job pays for the home and the bills, no money for entertainment. Again, I rather pay rent if it's going to be less than mortgage but have my dh spend more time with family.

My marriage sucks because he is too busy and too tire to be with me.
Why be married if dh does not have time and energy to nourish the relationship.
Sometimes I feel I would be better off (at peace) if I wasn't married.

My dd hardly sees her dad because he's too busy working.

I wonder what the purpose of life is?

Yeah, you might think my life is full of roses compare to others that don't have a job, are going through a divorce, lost a family or don't have good health but right now I feel like I only have luxuries (the home) but not a real family. That's all I want, no luxuries, just my family.

So if you have a family that spends time with you and shows you and tells you that they love you, be happy, you are so lucky!!!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:40 PM on Dec. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • You should talk to him about how you feel.
    L0vingMy3Girls

    Answer by L0vingMy3Girls at 10:42 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Talk to Dh about it. He probably shows his love to you both by provding the security of a nice home. My Dad was like that. We can all feel down sometimes you don't need to feel guilty about it :-) You can change your situation just by changing your perspective. Maybe you can babysit anther child your daughters age for some spending cash. I use to work as a nanny when I only had one child. It was nice for my child to have a playmate and I was able to take her on all kinds of outings that I could not otherwise afford.
    hotrodlassie

    Answer by hotrodlassie at 10:45 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Oh, I am so sorry :( I know how you feel. My DH is around, but most of the time he isn't very nice. Hang in there. You have your DD!
    KrazyChick

    Answer by KrazyChick at 10:47 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • hugs

    beyondhopes

    Answer by beyondhopes at 10:47 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Quality family time is hard to get. A big mortgage and house as a status symbol may be what is important to him. I am with you, downsizing is what I want to do. When we look at houses online, dh always looks at the monstrosities with tons of space. Talking about making a housing change may help with the financial issues, but it also sounds like he is away at work. Like in the movie "Hook" the men are missing their childrens' growing. Good luck.
    tortkey

    Answer by tortkey at 10:56 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • Mines home every day and let me tell you he might as well not be. All he does is sit on the computer. He doesn't even pick up after himself, forget about helping with the kids. He does do one other thing though, he bitches about EVERYTHING! Be thankful you don't have my man!!
    momof3xthefun

    Answer by momof3xthefun at 11:43 PM on Dec. 31, 2010

  • My husband worked two jobs throughout my second pregnancy to pay off our debt. While it was very nice of him to do that essentially for our family - I was alone, pregnant, working full-time, and taking care of my toddler. It's always a toss up. I felt alone and sad a lot, but I am the only one of my group of people that is debt free right now and that give us more opportunities. My good side is that it was only temporary. I'm sorry you are going through that. I agree with Tortkey that it's probably a status symbol to him, and that's how he's showing the love to his family. I would try to talk him into downsizing, and showing him what you could do with all the extra money - vacations, day off, etc.
    sunshine58103

    Answer by sunshine58103 at 12:40 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Have you ever thought of doing daycare out of your home? You could make VERY good money that way and you will have a bunch of little munchkins to love on. I am working at getting a daycare going so that I can work with kids all day rather than adults...not a fan of most adults. lol
    TitusMom7

    Answer by TitusMom7 at 1:58 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Just talk to him about how you're feeling.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 2:00 AM on Jan. 1, 2011

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