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My STBX is really.....Please help me understand this crap

So my STBX and I still live together.  He is really overstaying his welcome.  I don't want him here anymore.  We set a date for him to get the f!@# out and he's all, "We'll see if that happens"  wth  We'll see if what happens?  I'm to the point where I will have a cop escort him out if he doesn't leave on his own.  I have no sympathy for this ass anymore.  Would that be too harsh?


He Basically told me last night that he didn't feel we were compatible, we don't do this we don't do that, okay whatever, then why stick around.  I told him at this point in time if he doesn't feel like he wants to be with me, by all means leave and don't return.  I have too much on my plate to try and chase after some ass hole who has lead me to believe he wants to be with me, when in fact he doesn't.

I simply cannot be around him if he doesn't want this relationship.  We do have a child together, which to me is all the more reason he should hurry and get out because our environment right now is just negative.  

example: Yesterday I was trying to figure out how to get to an interview, but there was no public transportation running, so I was calling every friend I had to see if anyone was in town, I was all "I don't know how I am going to get there."  He told me to take the bike. "I'm not taking a BIKE in the RAIN to an INTERVIEW"  I def would not get the job, I'd be exhausted, it's like a half hour ride.  Then he was all "It looks like you're not trying to have a job then."  long story short I took a cab but that just pissed me off because the only reason I am looking for a SECOND JOB, on top of full-time school work, is because he got his hours cut and he's not pulling his weight any longer. 

Someone please analyze this for me.  I am at a freaking loss. If you don't want to be with someone why do you want to stay and make them miserable and be mean to them? I don't understand. 


Asked by Anonymous at 2:34 PM on Jan. 1, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • Because he knows it makes you miserable . GL Momma

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 2:41 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Does he have to cook for himself? Clean up after himself? The only thing I can think of is because he's still got a 'wife' even if you guys aren't living and acting like a married couple. He's going to remain living there until he has no choice but to find another place to live. If he's not contributing like he used to, then he's hiding his money, which isn't fair. I'd make him pay more, like pay rent, food, utilities, or get the hell out. In which case, he'd be paying alimony and child support. Which, I'm betting he doesn't want to pay. And, buy living there, he's not having to pay. Take a stand, and do something.

    Answer by Raine2001 at 2:41 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • It sounds like he is just using you to have a place to stay... I would call the cops. I have been there... it isn't fun! It also isn't worth your sanity!! Good luck!

    Answer by sissy0604 at 2:45 PM on Jan. 1, 2011

  • Do your divorce papers say you get the house? If so, then the police can escort him out but if not and he gets his mail at your house then you have to have him evicted. Personally, I'd just tell him he's right, you are not compatible and it's time he found lodgings elsewhere. I'd even offer to help him pack!

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:51 PM on Jan. 1, 2011